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영작교정 게시판

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자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

In what ways are credit cards better than cash?

작성자: 황*하
2022-04-07 585

회원님의 영작문

I believe that most Koreans prefer to use credit or debit card than cash wherever they pay for. It is really convenient and no need to think about changes. People just hold their smart phone these days because it is possible to pay with their devices, even it can be used for T-money so they just need to put their phones on the sensor plate. Samsung relesed a model which has payment function a few years ago and people are able to register their credit cards into the phone regardless of quantity and type of credit cards. It allows people to manage their spending by checking the amount monthly. It is really important for people to know how much they spend in a month because there is a minimum amount customer has to spend if they want to get a discount in various places or benifits from the card companies. In conclusion, I think people don't want to posess cash in their pocket because there is a risk of lossing their money. If it is possible to use cashes anywhere, I would use credit card

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


I believe that most Koreans prefer to use credit or debit card than cash wherever they pay for. 
>> CORRECT!
It is really convenient and no need to think about changes. 
>> CORRECT!
People just hold their smart phone these days because it is possible to pay with their devices, even it can be used for T-money so they just need to put their phones on the sensor plate. 
>> CORRECT!
Samsung relesed a model which has payment function a few years ago and people are able to register their credit cards into the phone regardless of quantity and type of credit cards. 
>>  Samsung released a model which has a payment function a few years ago, and people are able to register their credit cards into the phone regardless of quantity and type of credit cards. 
OR >> Samsung released a model which has a payment function a few years ago, and people are able to register their credit cards into their phones regardless of quantity and type of credit cards. 
It allows people to manage their spending by checking the amount monthly. 
>> CORRECT!
It is really important for people to know how much they spend in a month because there is a minimum amount customer has to spend if they want to get a discount in various places or benifits from the card companies. 
>> It is really important for people to know how much they spend in a month, because there is a minimum amount a customer has to spend if they want to get a discount in various places or benefits from the card companies. 
In conclusion, I think people don't want to posess cash in their pocket because there is a risk of lossing their money. 
>> In conclusion, I think people don't want to have a cash in their pocket because there is a risk of losing their money. 
If it is possible to use cashes anywhere, I would use credit card
>> If it is possible to use a cash anywhere, I would still use a credit card.
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