¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Wednesday Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*¿ì
2022-04-13 416

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q:What do you like most about your country?
A:I like that our country have systematic education system,
If the education system is good, then students can learn many things efficiently, and can learn more things.
Also, systematic education system make student's imagination more creative.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Paul!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


I like that our country have systematic education system,

>> I like that our country has a systematic education system.
If the education system is good, then students can learn many things efficiently, and can learn more things.

>> If the education system is good, then students can learn many things efficiently and they can learn more things.
Also, systematic education system make student's imagination more creative.

>> Also, a systematic education system makes a student's imagination more creative.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119509 What is your opinion about Xenophobia in your country? Does it... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-01 751
119508 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-01 307
119507 What advice would you give to people staring in business? ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-01 1
119506 Do you think bullying should be made a crime or is it part of... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-01 473
119505 Do you think that most people are naturally able to get along... ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-01 2
119504 What was the most interesting thing you did during a holiday? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-01 494
119503 How important are clocks for you? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-01 450
119502 home work ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-01 509
119501 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-01 695
119500 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-01 4
119499 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-01 1
119498 My frineds ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-01 4
119497 Homework ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-01 3
119496 What do you think about working four days a week? ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-01 512
119495 Q È«*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-01 480
119494 What\'s your ideal fitness program? / What do you want to... ±è*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2022-06-01 397
119493 What are the labor laws that had changed in your country? ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-01 609
119492 Do you usually plan your weekends? ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-01 645
119491 Do you easily trust people you barely know? ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-01 658
119490 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-01 457

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04