¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Thank you!!

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*¼±
2022-04-25 605

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I'm sure that this award will assist me to complete these goals. As a full-time mom, I am not able to get a job since parenting a 2-year-old baby, I need help with financial tuition now. So If I get the chance to get this award, it will be a big help for me.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Paster - Jisun is a faithful and active member at Henderson UMC. She did her best to visit members of Henderson UMC and they enjoy time with her very much. She is very passionate and supportive of church activities and worship services.

Hi, Elly!
I have to edit this article to apply for a scholarship. I need your help. thanks!!

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Pastor Jisun,
Your writing composition is actually fantastic!
I just did some slight corrections.
May GOD HIMSELF open doors for you!
GOD bless you greatly pastor!
Teacher Elly. 
Thank you!!
I'm sure that this award will assist me to complete these goals. 
CORRECT!
or>>I'm certain that this award will help me in completing these goals. 
As a full-time mom, I am not able to get a job since parenting a 2-year-old baby, I need help with financial tuition now. 
>>As a full-time mom, I am not able to get a job since parenting a 2-year-old baby, I need help with my finances in order to pay for my tuition now. 
So If I get the chance to get this award, it will be a big help for me.
>>So If I get a chance to win this award, it will be a big help for me.
Paster - Jisun is a faithful and active member at Henderson UMC. 
>>Pastor Jisun is a faithful and an active member at the Henderson UMC. 
She did her best to visit members of Henderson UMC and they enjoy time with her very much. 
>>She does her best in visiting the members of Henderson UMC and they are enjoying their time with her very much. 
She is very passionate and supportive of church activities and worship services.
>>She is very passionate and supportive of the church activities and worship services.
Hi, Elly!
I have to edit this article to apply for a scholarship. I need your help. thanks!!
Hi, Elly!
CORRECT!
or>>I need this article edited in order to apply for a scholarship. I need your help please. thanks!!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118272 Writing Task(Apr 13th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-04-16 384
118271 What do you think of people who complain a lot? ½Å*¼· ÁøÇàÁß 2022-04-15 390
118270 Is setting a deadline important? why do you say so? ½Å*¼· ÁøÇàÁß 2022-04-15 379
118269 I don\\\'t want to be in a rush. ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-15 486
118268 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ÁøÇàÁß 2022-04-15 1
118267 According to the article, with the opening of the Seoul Arena,... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-15 354
118266 What is the best memory you have of your family doing something... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-15 413
118265 4/14 HOMEWORK ( •̀ ¥ø •́ )y ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 441
118264 What I should do every day but don¡¯t. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 449
118263 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 2
118262 What is the best thing about your birthplace? ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 528
118261 What is your greatest childhood memory? Answer in a few... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 389
118260 What is something you should do every day but don\'t? And why? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 285
118259 HOMEWORK ¹è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 298
118258 Listen and Take Notes Discussion °­*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 467
118257 It is valued to spend time together. ±è*Å ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 0
118256 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 0
118255 homework °¨*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 1
118254 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 349
118253 The best memories ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-04-14 395

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04