¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Which one do you think is better, electronic books or traditional books, and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2022-04-28 463

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my opinion, traditional books are better than electronic books.
First, reading an electronic book may hurt our eyes.
As you know, watching our phones a lot could hurt our eyes (and so as electronic books).
Second, We can feel a specific emotion by reading a traditional book.
A traditional book is made of paper, so we can feel specific emotions by reading it.
Because of these reasons, I think that traditional books are better than electronic books.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! 

I prefer traditional books too because most of the facts there are accurate. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon. 

In my opinion, traditional books are better than electronic books.
>>  CORRECT

First, reading an electronic book may hurt our eyes.
>> CORRECT

As you know, watching our phones a lot could hurt our eyes (and so as electronic books)
>> CORRECT

Second, We can feel a specific emotion by reading a traditional book.
>> Second, we can feel a specific emotion by reading a traditional book.

A traditional book is made of paper, so we can feel specific emotions by reading it.
>> CORRECT

Because of these reasons, I think that traditional books are better than electronic books.
>> CORRECT

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119714 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 572
119713 What are you preparing for these days? ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 2
119712 How long do you want to live? Please discuss your answer. ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 683
119711 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 641
119710 My parents told me about getting married. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 478
119709 How would you describe your family? / What is your ideal family... ±è*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 565
119708 homework ¿ø*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 554
119707 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 3
119706 Do you think we will be able to cure cancer one day? What can we... ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 1
119705 About climate and weather ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 7
119704 What are some good points about social networking? What are some... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 581
119703 How important is farming in your country? And Why? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 840
119702 Do you think it is good to always ask for suggestions? Why or... ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 624
119701 home work ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 688
119700 What do you think is the best job in the world? Why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 575
119699 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 541
119698 homeworrk ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 555
119697 What is the best historical place there in South Korea and why? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 0
119696 What do you think is the best job in the world? Why? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 0
119695 homework ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-08 625

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04