¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

I think it¡¯s important to keep going.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*ÁØ
2022-05-03 523

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think it¡¯s important to keep going.
Unfortunately, I can¡¯t do anything for a long time but for a short time I can focus.
I¡¯m always trying to make my time useful. I am very interested in the use of my spare time.
I have free time ten times a day. The free time is as short as 10 minutes and as long as 50 minutes.

1. As soon as I wake up, I post prepared English on my blog for 10 minutes.
2.~, 3.~
4.when I take a bus I study 3 words for 15minutes
5.when I walk from the bus stop to the company, I listen to a lecture about management~
6. After lunch, while taking a walk ~
7. When I get home from work, I listen to a lecture about English and post on Facebook.
In the future, when I post, I will try to post both in Korean and English. etc.
And then I participate in foreign worship services held in English every Sunday.
In about 3 months I hope to be as good as anyone I know in English. I really want to continue. I think this is how I can grow.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Elliot!

Thank you so much for doing well in this output. I do admire your hard work and your desire to improve a lot. I also believe that you can achieve English fluency. Wow! I can't believe you do all these things! I am quite ashamed because it seems like you make use of your free time much better than me. I wish I can be as productive as you!

As for your answers, I particularly like your use of the word "spare". Very good word choice! As for the corrections, they are only about the punctuation marks like missing commas, periods, and some capitalization at the beginning of sentences. Please remember to capitalize the first word of sentences.

I also think it is important to keep going, so keep it up, and I'll talk to you on Thursday.

-Teacher Violet.

I think it¡¯s important to keep going.
>> CORRECT!

     Unfortunately, I can¡¯t do anything for a long time but for a short time I can focus.
>> Unfortunately, I can¡¯t do anything for a long time but for a short time, I can focus.

I¡¯m always trying to make my time useful. 
>> CORRECT!

I am very interested in the use of my spare time.
>> CORRECT!

I have free time ten times a day. 
>> CORRECT!

The free time is as short as 10 minutes and as long as 50 minutes.
>> CORRECT!

1. As soon as I wake up, I post prepared English on my blog for 10 minutes.
>> CORRECT!

     4.when I take a bus I study 3 words for 15minutes
>> 4. When I take a bus I study 3 words for 15minutes.

     5.when I walk from the bus stop to the company, I listen to a lecture about management~
>> 5. When I walk from the bus stop to the company, I listen to a lecture about management~

6. After lunch, while taking a walk ~
>> CORRECT!

7. When I get home from work, I listen to a lecture about English and post on Facebook.
>> CORRECT!

     In the future, when I post, I will try to post both in Korean and English. etc.
>> In the future, when I post, I will try to post both in Korean and English, etc.

And then I participate in foreign worship services held in English every Sunday.
>> CORRECT!

In about 3 months I hope to be as good as anyone I know in English. 
>> CORRECT!

I really want to continue. 
>> CORRECT!

I think this is how I can grow.
>> CORRECT!


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118400 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 395
118399 What song would you like to dedicate to your parents and why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 582
118398 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 357
118397 Who are Bloomberg competitors? How is Bloomberg different from... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 567
118396 home work ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 404
118395 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 375
118394 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 544
118393 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 508
118392 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 450
118391 What kind of skillset is/are required in analytics and sales? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 509
118390 More people in your country believe that your nation should... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 476
118389 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 2
118388 Tell me about the news that you were interested in lately. ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 453
118387 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 1
118386 Lucky person ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 2
118385 Should BTS be exempted from military service? Why? ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 464
118384 money and kids ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 515
118383 There are so many pockets that it is sometimes convenient or not ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 427
118382 2nd assignment À±*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 495
118381 What is your favorite book and why? What lessons can you learn... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-21 414

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04