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작성자: 윤*영
2022-05-03 567

회원님의 영작문

If I had a chance to live anothet country, I would like to live in Africa. Since I have a dream for making a better world with education, I hope to educate Africa children. I belive that well-educated children can live their own lives without any help from others. The reason why I chose Africa among other countries is that I read a book titled "Africa children's school life." They studied in tough environments. One of the tribes should go to school across the river with a small robber boat. Can you believe it? They study only two hours but the way to and from school is really tough. Even though they were in difficult situations, they try to study hard and enjoy it. After I read the book, I want to become a mentor for Africa students. By helping them, they can grow up a person who can help their successors. If well-educated people are increased, the country will overvome poverty.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi Sophia, I'm impressed at how well you came up with this thoughtful idea. You are such a kind person. Keep doing what you love and stay safe. ~ T. Lyn
If I had a chance to live anothet country, I would like to live in Africa.
>>If I have the opportunity to live in another country, I would like to live in Africa.
Since I have a dream for making a better world with education, I hope to educate Africa children.
>>I want to educate African children because I have a dream of making a better world through education.
I belive that well-educated children can live their own lives without any help from others.
>>I believe that well-educated children can live their own lives without the help of others.
The reason why I chose Africa among other countries is that I read a book titled "Africa children's school life."
>>The reason I chose Africa among other countries is because I read a book called "African Children's School Life."
They studied in tough environments.
>>I found out that children studied in a difficult environment.
One of the tribes should go to school across the river with a small robber boat.
>>One of the tribes has to go to school across the river in a small rubber boat.
Can you believe it?
>>Correct.
They study only two hours but the way to and from school is really tough.
>>They study for only two hours, but the road to and from school is really tough.
Even though they were in difficult situations, they try to study hard and enjoy it.
>>Correct.
After I read the book, I want to become a mentor for Africa students.
>>After reading the book, I want to be a mentor to African students.
By helping them, they can grow up a person who can help their successors.
>>By helping them, they can grow into people who can help their successors.
If well-educated people are increased, the country will overvome poverty.
>>More educated people can overcome poverty.
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