¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Which one do you think is better, living with relatives or living alone? Explain your answer.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2022-05-04 322

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my opinion, living alone is much better than living with relatives.
First, there are a lot of differences between me and my relatives.
There are sometimes conflicts of opinions between me and my family, and me and my relatives will do so.
And also I just want to live alone if I don't have my own family.
Because of these reasons, living alone is much better than living with relatives for me.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John! 

Both has their pros and cons. It really depends on the person. Me, I prefer living alone because I like being independent.

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon

In my opinion, living alone is much better than living with relatives.
>> CORRECT

First, there are a lot of differences between me and my relatives.
>> CORRECT

There are sometimes conflicts of opinions between me and my family, and me and my relatives will do so.
>> Sometimes there are conflicts of opinions between me and my family. 

And also I just want to live alone if I don't have my own family.
>> Also, I want to live along even if I don't have my own family yet. 

Because of these reasons, living alone is much better than living with relatives for me. 
>> CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119012 Easy ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-15 2
119011 What are your short-term and long-term goals? ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-15 336
119010 Colleague-2 ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-15 7
119009 What else do you want to learn aside from your major? Answer in... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-14 328
119008 Middle school ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-14 6
119007 Drama ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-14 5
119006 What is the most memorable birthday you\'ve ever had? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-05-14 275
119005 What was the most memorable school activity you experienced when... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-14 319
119004 When was the last time you said you were sorry? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-05-14 2
119003 If you can change something about the government of South Korea,... ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-14 0
119002 5.13 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-05-14 298
119001 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-14 300
119000 Writing Task(May 13th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 431
118999 5/13 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 299
118998 I can¡¯t live in another country. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 285
118997 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 0
118996 In our country, there are some common practices. First, the... ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 318
118995 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 278
118994 How would you describe an ideal weekend? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 326
118993 homework Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04