¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

online

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2022-05-09 506

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Politicians are dividing the people into men and women.

Their purpose is only one to win in the elections.

Several policies let increase conflicts by generation and by men and women.

But venting their complaint theough anline is not a democratic behavior.

It seem to be collective selfishness and a kind of victimization.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good afternoon, Ms. Lily!
Thank  you for allowing me to read your thought today. Keep writing to develop your skill.
Have a great day!
T. Aki~
Politicians are dividing the people into men and women.
>>> CORRECT!
Their purpose is only one to win in the elections.
>>> Their purpose is only to win the elections.
Several policies let increase conflicts by generation and by men and women.
>>> Several policies let increase conflicts by generation and between men and women.
But venting their complaint theough anline is not a democratic behavior.
>>> But venting their complaint online is not democratic behavior.
It seem to be collective selfishness and a kind of victimization.
>>> It seems to be collective selfishness and a kind of victimization.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119074 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-17 506
119073 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-17 0
119072 1st homework ÀÌ* ¿Ï·á 2022-05-17 538
119071 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-05-17 1
119070 What is the most dangerous thing you¡¯ve done? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-17 0
119069 No visiting ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-17 3
119068 What is your opinion about ¡°edu-sitters¡±? Do you think they... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-17 800
119067 What do you want to be improved in your country\'s health care... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-17 764
119066 The most expensive thing. ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-05-17 469
119065 How was your childhood in your time? Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-17 513
119064 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-17 1
119063 Myhomework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2022-05-17 486
119062 Do you think people should give money to homeless people? Why or... ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-05-17 1
119061 5.16 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-05-17 650
119060 Should Japan say \'SORRY\' to South Korea? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-05-17 2
119059 Do you think North Korea and South Korea will unite soon? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-05-17 631
119058 Disadvantages of Technology ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 488
119057 Machines that makes our lives easier ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 512
119056 5/16 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 574
119055 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-16 519

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04