¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Banning Serving Fast Food To Students

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*¹Î
2022-05-10 517

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think schools should ban serving fast food to students. To begin with, fast food is not healthy to students even if it is delicious. Especially, students are in period of growth. That are particularly carefully times, so it is necessary to care the food for students. Because it can be influence to their heights and weights or skins. Furthermore, they can addict the fast food. More eating it, more wanting it. Actually, there are the research about addiction with fast food. It can be make students grow apart from slowly food like vegetables. Finally, people eat it whenever after all. Then, it is okay that we don't become familiar with it when we are students. There are a little good effects of fast food.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Kate!
Those are some good points you just made there.
The statements you chose were simple and clear.
This is the kind of work I expect from you.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
I think schools should ban serving fast food to students. 
>> Correct
To begin with, fast food is not healthy to students even if it is delicious. 
>> To begin with, fast food is not good for the health of students even if it is delicious. 
Especially, students are in period of growth. 
>> Especially, students are in a period of growth. 
That are particularly carefully times, so it is necessary to care the food for students. 
>> They need to be careful this particular time so it is necessary to care about the food of students. 
Because it can be influence to their heights and weights or skins. 
>> Food can affect their height, weight or skin. 
Furthermore, they can addict the fast food. 
>> Furthermore, they can be addicted to fast food. 
More eating it, more wanting it. 
>> The more they eat, the more they want it.
Actually, there are the research about addiction with fast food. 
>> Actually, there is a lot of research about addiction to fast food. 
It can be make students grow apart from slowly food like vegetables. 
>> It can take away students from healthy food like vegetables. 
Finally, people eat it whenever after all. 
>> Finally, people can eat junk food anytime.
Then, it is okay that we don't become familiar with it when we are students. 
>> Then, it is okay that we don't become familiar with it while we are still students. 
There are a little good effects of fast food
>> There are very few benefits of eating fast food. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
117492 2022.3.16 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 873
117491 202.3.15 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 818
117490 Is there anything you dislike about weekends? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 1
117489 Aside from yourself, do you also worry about the health of those... ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 1429
117488 How do you usually cope with your stress? ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 1342
117487 Do you want to change something in your appearance? Why or why... Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 1188
117486 What are the ways to slow down aging? Àå*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 1451
117485 What are some of the products Bloomberg focuses on? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 569
117484 Do you ever feel that you waste your free time? How? À±*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 856
117483 Do you want to change something in your appearance? Why or why... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-03-18 1100
117482 Do you have a different attitude to English homework now than... ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 848
117481 What is the most difficult part of learning a language? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 2
117480 3/17 homework ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 740
117479 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 1
117478 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 0
117477 HOMEWORK ¹è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 661
117476 How do you overcome stress at work? ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 764
117475 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 1
117474 Good evening! °­*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 574
117473 I would appreciate it if you could check the sentence below. ½Å*±³ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 916

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04