¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¤*¿ø
2022-05-13 418

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Should poor people be punished for stealing if they are stealing to feed their families?

Of course. Because It is a crime. They need to be punished less, but it doesn't tell they don't be punished. The punishment must be done to every criminal regardless economic environment. If they don't have money, they don't steal, they just work.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Won! 

Yes, a crime is a crime. The law excuses no one. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

Of course. Because It is a crime. 
>> Of course because it is a crime. 

They need to be punished less, but it doesn't tell they don't be punished. 
>> They need to be punished but not as severe as other criminals. 

The punishment must be done to every criminal regardless economic environment. 
>> Every criminal should be punished regardless of their reasons. 

If they don't have money, they don't steal, they just work.
>> If they don't have money, they shouldn't steal but work instead. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118986 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 293
118985 HOMEWORK: ¹®*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 368
118984 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 3
118983 Homework ±è*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 390
118982 The most interesting person I met on one of my travels. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 564
118981 Education ÃÖ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 505
118980 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 473
118979 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 1
118978 name of school ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 433
118977 Strange food in China Àå*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 395
118976 If you can change something about the government of South Korea,... ÀÌ* ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 2
118975 the school ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 269
118974 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 423
118973 Is there something you wish you could do with your free time but... ¹Ú*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 359
118972 Where do you prefer to live when you retire, in the city or in... ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 1
118971 5.12 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 307
118970 5.12 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 457
118969 Homework. ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 11
118968 Do you think gadgets improved our lives? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 1
118967 Is there something you wish you could do with your free time but... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-05-13 421

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04