¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Are you worried about your future?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½Å*¼·
2022-05-19 747

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

For sure, at my age in South Korea, men worry about the future. getting my own house, getting a job, dating, etc. I'm most worried about how to get my own house, house prices have risen dramatically, and mortgage loans are also hard to get.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Elic! 

Yes, the prices of houses there are unbelievable! 
 
Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon. 

For sure, at my age in South Korea, men worry about the future. 
>> For sure, men at my age here in South Korea usually worry about their future. 

getting my own house, getting a job, dating, etc. I'm most worried about how to get my own house, house prices have risen dramatically, and mortgage loans are also hard to get.
>> They usually worry about owning a house and getting a job. I am most worried about getting my own house because real estate prices have risen dramatically and mortgage loans are also hard to get. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121126 Do you believe that a dog is a \"man\'s best friend\"? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 973
121125 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 945
121124 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 800
121123 What comes to mind when you hear the word ¡®earthquake¡¯? Why do... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 979
121122 How different would your life be if there were no Facebook,... ±Ç*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 940
121121 What was the last piece of good news you heard? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1239
121120 The life without books. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1103
121119 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1143
121118 Right? ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 2
121117 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 0
121116 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 2
121115 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1116
121114 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1048
121113 Which among your goals have you already achieved? ä*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 845
121112 Previous class review (Husbands job, Korea society problem) À¯*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 2
121111 Do you think that art is important to society? Why? Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1102
121110 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 0
121109 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1
121108 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1
121107 smartphone Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04