¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¿ø*¿¬
2022-06-03 848

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The most interesting city to visit in our country is Busan Haeundae. Beacause Haeundae beach is very nice and every year,there is Haeundae sand festival. In sand festival we can meet many nice work.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Grace! ^^
Thank you again for this~
Please check the corrections. ^^
Have a good weekend!

- T. Rina


1. The most interesting city to visit in our country is Busan Haeundae. 
>> The most interesting city to visit in our country is Haeundae, Busan.

2. Beacause Haeundae beach is very nice and every year,there is Haeundae sand festival. 
>> Because Haeundae beach is very nice and there is a sand festival every year.

3. In sand festival we can meet many nice work
>> During the sand festival, we can meet many nice people.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118485 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-25 667
118484 What are the pros and cons of using online banking/ transactions? Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-25 549
118483 Computer and writing. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-04-25 687
118482 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-04-25 2
118481 Bothering ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-25 3
118480 If you can change something about your lifestyle, what would it... ±Ý*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-25 660
118479 Thank you!! ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2022-04-25 909
118478 Hi, Elly! I need to edit it. ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2022-04-25 626
118477 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-25 1
118476 childhood image À±*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-25 573
118475 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-25 515
118474 More and more people today are moving away from where their... ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-25 0
118473 What are these problems and how might they be reduced? ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-24 0
118472 Writing Task(Apr 22th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-04-24 752
118471 Writing Task(Apr 21th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-04-24 753
118470 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-24 2
118469 Homework ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-24 0
118468 What kind of sport do you want to try? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-04-24 619
118467 Do you think there should be a law that requires everyone to... ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-24 1
118466 4/22 h.w Çö*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-04-24 788

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04