¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

My Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: °­*¿ì
2022-06-08 901

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think it is the demilitarized zone known as DMZ, which is in the middle of the military demarcation line because it has 70 years of history betwine south and north Korea.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Kane!  

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I think it is the demilitarized zone known as DMZ, which is in the middle of the military demarcation line because it has 70 years of history betwine south and north Korea
>>  I think it is the demilitarized zone known as DMZ, which is in the middle of the military demarcation line, because it has 70 years of history between South and North Korea
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119394 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-29 2
119393 Hobby ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-29 2
119392 Safe ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-29 2
119391 Drama ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-29 3
119390 What activity do you like best when you are with your book club... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-28 596
119389 What do you think is the importance of having personal space and... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-28 473
119388 What do you think is the biggest problem your country is facing? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-05-28 296
119387 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-28 471
119386 5.27 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-05-28 618
119385 Living below the poverty line. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-05-28 509
119384 Writing Task(May 23th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-05-27 469
119383 5/27 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-27 484
119382 Writing Task(May 25th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-05-27 553
119381 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-27 0
119380 When is not communicating the best? Share your answer in a few... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-27 540
119379 Parliamentary election ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-05-27 597
119378 We can\'t see animals ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-05-27 657
119377 Right? ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-27 1
119376 What are your plans for this weekend? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-27 582
119375 What is the meaning of \"give and take\"? What does this mean to... ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-05-27 488

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04