¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

It men feel more emotional, do you think that the world will be more balanced?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÇÑ*¼ö
2022-06-14 598

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If men feel more emotional, the world more balanced. men don't like to have sympathy, Their best value is different with women. That is achievement, in another words, taking something. They don't focus the process. So, if they care the process with emotion & sympathy, The world's direction will be changed.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Jisu!

I couln't agree more with you. As mentioned in class, both genders have their respective traits. If we learn to become the other, then, we can master coexisting with each other.

Thank you for the brilliance in your answer. Take note that the underlined or underscored letters, words, or phrases are suggestions to enhance your sentences. Kindly go over them when you have the time to do so.

See you again soon for more meaningful discussions.

-T. Donna =)

If men feel more emotional, the world more balanced. 
>>  If men feel more emotional, the world would be more balanced. 

men don't like to have sympathy, Their best value is different with women. 
>> Men don't like to have sympathy since their best value is different with women. 

That is achievement, in another words, taking something. 
>> Correct!
Or: That is by achievements, in others words, (taking/ possessing) something.

They don't focus the process. 
>> They don't focus on the process.

So, if they care the process with emotion & sympathy, The world's direction will be changed.
>>  So, if they care about the process with emotion & sympathy, the world's direction will be changed.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119669 I like my eating habit ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 555
119668 Homework ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 523
119667 I know many happily married couples. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 520
119666 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 435
119665 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 448
119664 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 2
119663 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 342
119662 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 514
119661 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 505
119660 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 436
119659 Expensive gift ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 471
119658 About season ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 2
119657 homewokr ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 470
119656 homework ¿ø*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 463
119655 Do you think that you should change your eating habits? Why or... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 480
119654 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 377
119653 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 513
119652 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 542
119651 What are some superstitions in your country? Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 568
119650 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-07 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04