¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

6.14 Writing

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³²*½Â
2022-06-14 417

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

What is your favorite place in your city and why?

In my city, there are a few places within ten minutes distance by driving near where I live now. A big pond around which I can take a walk and a huge theme park are among those. The former is what my wife likes to go and the latter is the place my daughter loves to go. Actually, we have the annual memberships for the park.

And we go to the East Sea thesedays since my daugher loves to play with the sand on the beach. The beach sand is really soft, compared to the on on the land

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Seung!  

Wow, you live in the wonderful place. There is a lot of access to beautiful cites. I'm happy for you! 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

In my city, there are a few places within ten minutes distance by driving near where I live now. 
>> In my city, there are a few places within ten minutes distance by driving, near where I live now. 
A big pondaround which I can take a walk and a huge theme park are among those. 
>> There is a big pond here where I can talk walks. There's also a huge theme park here. 

The former is what my wife likes to go and the latter is the place my daughter loves to go. 
>> The "Former" is the place where my wife likes to go to and the "Latter" is my daughter's favorite. 

Actually, we have the annual memberships for the park.
>> Actually, we have an annual memberships for the park.

And we go to the East Sea thesedays since my daugher loves to play with the sand on the beach. 
>> We usually go to the East Sea these days since my daughter loves to play with the sand on the beach. 

The beach sand is really soft, compared to the on on the land
>> The beach sand is really soft, compared to the ones on the land. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119181 Do you enjoy the food on airplanes? / What\'s your memorable... ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-20 1
119180 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-20 249
119179 Do students get enough sleep on school days? ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-05-20 346
119178 [Homework] Q. What are the advantages and disadvantages of... ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-20 5
119177 If you could have three wishes that would come true, what would... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-05-20 373
119176 How do you feel about tourists in your country? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 4
119175 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 231
119174 5/19 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 373
119173 You said in our lesson that you need money to be happy but most... ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 424
119172 The some downsides of living in the countryside. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 375
119171 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 2
119170 What kind of pets would you like to have? ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 1
119169 How do you deal with stress? ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 475
119168 What do you want to eat when you are celebrating? Why? ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 290
119167 Colleague ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 4
119166 How does rain change your feelings? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 357
119165 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 1
119164 About smoking ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 14
119163 Are you worried about your future? Why or why not? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 386
119162 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-19 354

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04