¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What holiday do you think should be removed from your country and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*
2022-06-20 907

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

well I don't know about the holidays. it never concerns my work. the national holidays are not for me. on that holidays, I should work harder for incoming people. since I worked for food and beverage industry, I have never got a rest on those days. but I don't blame on the work. it is my choice so and I don't want to go to a place fully filled up by people. I don't like be at a crowd space. I much prefer to be in a quiet place or at home. so, for me, it doesn't matter if we remove all the holidays(maybe I want to). anyhow I will be in the brewery or the pub so.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Lim!  

You and my husband have the same thinking since both of you are in the food and beverage industry. You guys never really get the chance to enjoy these days. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.


well I don't know about the holidays. 
>> Well, I don't know a lot about holidays. 

it never concerns my work.
>> It never concerns my work.

the national holidays are not for me. 
>> The national holidays are not for me. 

on that holidays, I should work harder for incoming people. 
>> On holidays, I should work harder for  incoming people. 

since I worked for food and beverage industry, I have never got a rest on those days. 
>> Since I work for the food and beverage industry, I never rest on those days. 

but I don't blame on the work. 
>> But I don't blame my work. 

it is my choice so and I don't want to go to a place fully filled up by people. 
>> It is my choice so and I don't want to go to a place that is filled up by people. 

I don't like be at a crowd space. 
>> I don't like being in crowded places. 

I much prefer to be in a quiet place or at home. 
>> I prefer to be in a quiet place or at home. 

so, for me, it doesn't matter if we remove all the holidays(maybe I want to). 
>> So for me, it doesn't matter if we remove all the holidays. 

anyhow I will be in the brewery or the pub so.
>> Anyhow, I will be in the brewery or the pub. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120119 Do you love spicy food? Why do some people love eating spicy... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 759
120118 my home2 ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 582
120117 What do you think children worry about most these days? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 0
120116 The second homework ÀÌ*¸í ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 1
120115 mistake ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 1
120114 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 2
120113 my home ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 620
120112 6.23. ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 643
120111 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 1
120110 Clarification and Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 736
120109 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 0
120108 Q È«*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 630
120107 Homework. For 06.22.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 1
120106 Is peer pressure beneficial or harmful? Why? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 1
120105 What do you think is the best country in the world and why? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 997
120104 How long do you get ready for work? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-06-23 657
120103 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 734
120102 What is special about your country¡¯s cuisine? ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 680
120101 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 2
120100 What are you going to eat for dinner tonight? ÇÑ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-22 555

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04