¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What holiday do you think should be removed from your country and why?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*
2022-06-20 1139

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

well I don't know about the holidays. it never concerns my work. the national holidays are not for me. on that holidays, I should work harder for incoming people. since I worked for food and beverage industry, I have never got a rest on those days. but I don't blame on the work. it is my choice so and I don't want to go to a place fully filled up by people. I don't like be at a crowd space. I much prefer to be in a quiet place or at home. so, for me, it doesn't matter if we remove all the holidays(maybe I want to). anyhow I will be in the brewery or the pub so.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Lim!  

You and my husband have the same thinking since both of you are in the food and beverage industry. You guys never really get the chance to enjoy these days. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.


well I don't know about the holidays. 
>> Well, I don't know a lot about holidays. 

it never concerns my work.
>> It never concerns my work.

the national holidays are not for me. 
>> The national holidays are not for me. 

on that holidays, I should work harder for incoming people. 
>> On holidays, I should work harder for  incoming people. 

since I worked for food and beverage industry, I have never got a rest on those days. 
>> Since I work for the food and beverage industry, I never rest on those days. 

but I don't blame on the work. 
>> But I don't blame my work. 

it is my choice so and I don't want to go to a place fully filled up by people. 
>> It is my choice so and I don't want to go to a place that is filled up by people. 

I don't like be at a crowd space. 
>> I don't like being in crowded places. 

I much prefer to be in a quiet place or at home. 
>> I prefer to be in a quiet place or at home. 

so, for me, it doesn't matter if we remove all the holidays(maybe I want to). 
>> So for me, it doesn't matter if we remove all the holidays. 

anyhow I will be in the brewery or the pub so.
>> Anyhow, I will be in the brewery or the pub. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
119341 What¡¯s the best birthday party you¡¯ve ever had? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-26 621
119340 What festivals or celebrations does your country have during the... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-26 392
119339 about transportation ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-05-26 4
119338 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-26 4
119337 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-26 424
119336 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-26 574
119335 Good and bad experiences with sports at school. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-05-26 758
119334 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-05-26 1
119333 A hobby ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-26 4
119332 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-26 0
119331 Q È«*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-26 1
119330 pictures ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-26 538
119329 5.25 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-05-26 535
119328 In your culture, is it polite to be straightforward and direct... ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-05-26 622
119327 Aside from a house and car, what are other things for rent in... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-05-26 2
119326 What festivals or celebrations does your country have during the... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-05-26 616
119325 5/25 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-25 544
119324 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-05-25 2
119323 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-25 511
119322 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-25 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04