¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think getting old is a good thing or a bad thing? Explain your answer.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*ÁÖ
2022-06-21 1017

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think getting old is just a natural thing that we need to accept.
If we don't get old, then we need to live forever even tough out love ones are dead.
And if we live forever, then it will be so boring and we will lose the meaning of our lives.
Because of these reasons, I think getting old is just a natural thing that we have to accept.
So I will get old even tough I have a chance to live forever without getting old.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi John!  

Getting old is the only inevitable thing in this world. It's irreversible. 

Thank you for making an effort in answering your first homework for today. You did an awesome job! I'm so proud of you. Please read all the corrections I wrote down below and analyze them. I know you can do it. See you soon.

I think getting old is just a natural thing that we need to accept.
>>CORRECT

If we don't get old, then we need to live forever even tough out love ones are dead.
>> If we don't get old, then we need to live forever even though our loved ones are already dead. 

And if we live forever, then it will be so boring and we will lose the meaning of our lives.
>>CORRECT

Because of these reasons, I think getting old is just a natural thing that we have to accept.
>>CORRECT

So I will get old even tough I have a chance to live forever without getting old.
> > CORRECT
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123294 What do you think of celebrities who get plastic surgery? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-31 2
123293 Are cosmetics only for women? What do you think of cosmetics for... Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-31 2
123292 Do you ever cook for other people? Who do you cook for? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-31 2
123291 Have you ever burnt something in the kitchen? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-31 2
123290 10/24 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-10-30 3450
123289 Do you like taking vitamins or supplements? Answer in a few... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-30 4243
123288 Are you a helpful person? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-10-30 1
123287 Homework~~ ¹Ú*Çü ¿Ï·á 2022-10-30 1
123286 Homework~~ ¹Ú*Çü ¿Ï·á 2022-10-30 3004
123285 Travel ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-30 1
123284 What type of transportation do you prefer? ½Å*°ü ¿Ï·á 2022-10-30 3
123283 In your opinion, why does the season change? ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-10-29 2726
123282 What do you think is the most dangerous sport? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-29 2
123281 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-29 2334
123280 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-29 2269
123279 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-29 2534
123278 What is your hometown famous for? Give examples like famous... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-10-29 1855
123277 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-29 2114
123276 Free essay À±*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-29 4
123275 sensitive ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-28 2102

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04