¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Writing Task(Jun 28th, 2022)

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³²*½Â
2022-06-28 636

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In your own opinion, Should kids have cell phones?
Yes. kids must have cell phones.
A lot of parents say buying their children cell phones at their early age will spoil them and children do not need to have cell phones. But I don't see that.
I bought my daughter her cell phone this year. She is only 6 years old. However, I thought that she has to know how to make a phone call to me or her mom and how to take our call when needed, like when she is in an imergency with no adults around her. The phone she has has the minimum function : making calls, taking calls and taking pictures.
And when she gets older, I will buy her a new mobile phone with more functions.
The first and the foremost reason why I want buy a cell phone for her is for her safety!

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, U Seung! 

Thank you for sharing your thoughts on this one! Have a good night!

~T. Roanne ^_^
=============================================
Yes. kids must have cell phones.
>> Yes, kids must have cell phones. 
A lot of parents say buying their children cell phones at their early age will spoil them and children do not need to have cell phones. But I don't see that.
>> Correct! OR A lot of parents say buying their children cell phones at their early age will spoil them and children do not need to have cell phones, but I don't see that.
I bought my daughter her cell phone this year. She is only 6 years old. 
>> Correct! 
However, I thought that she has to know how to make a phone call to me or her mom and how to take our call when needed, like when she is in an imergency with no adults around her. 
>> However, I thought that she has to know how to make a phone call to me or her mom and how to take our call when needed, like when she is in an emergency with no adults around her. 
The phone she has has the minimum function : making calls, taking calls and taking pictures.
>> The phone she has has the minimum function: making calls, taking calls and taking pictures.
And when she gets older, I will buy her a new mobile phone with more functions.
>> Correct! 
The first and the foremost reason why I want buy a cell phone for her is for her safety!
>> The first and the foremost reason why I want to buy a cell phone for her is for her safety!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122878 What kinds of advertisements don\'t you like? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-10-09 2
122877 How could public transport in your city be improved? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-09 2
122876 Do you easily get affected by the bad mood of others? Answer in... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-09 2117
122875 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-08 3520
122874 Use the following words in sentences ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-10-08 2925
122873 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-08 3207
122872 weekend ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-07 3035
122871 When I have the blues¡¦ ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-10-07 2719
122870 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-10-07 2
122869 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-10-07 0
122868 10/7 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-07 3604
122867 What are your short-term and long-term goals? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-07 2769
122866 What are you most proud about your country that you can never... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-10-07 2711
122865 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-07 2433
122864 If you have nothing to do, do you enjoy yourself or do you get... ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-07 2567
122863 My short-term and long-term goals are.. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-10-07 2673
122862 Homework ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-07 1
122861 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-07 2653
122860 Control ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-07 1
122859 Are you a creative person? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-07 2425

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04