¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think you can be a minimalist?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*Çö
2022-06-29 729

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I'm not minimalist. I want to get something. I will get a lot of electric equipment. Later, I will use them when I become a programmer. I am greedy that I want to own many laptops and computers and much electric equipment.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good morning Jay!
Sure thing for a young mind like you have so many ideas! It's normal to have this kind off attitude  because it is your way of expressing your thoughts.
Thank you for your homework today and I have some few suggestions on how to write your sentence. keep learning :)
T. Aki~
I'm not minimalist. 
>>> CORRECT
I want to get something. 
>>> CORRECT
OR >>> There are still some things that I want to get.
I will get a lot of electric equipment. 
>>> I plan to get  lot of electronic equipment.
Later, I will use them when I become a programmer. 
>>> CORRECT
I am greedy that I want to own many laptops and computers and much electric equipment.
>>> I think I am greedy that I want to own many laptops and computers and more electronic equipment.



¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120157 What kind of people do you like to meet? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-24 2
120156 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-24 2009
120155 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-06-24 2
120154 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-24 928
120153 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-24 596
120152 my neighborhood ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-24 841
120151 Have you had a bad experience while eating at a restaurant? How... ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-24 867
120150 About my pleasant shopping experience. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-06-24 671
120149 Are there any hobbies you would you like to try? ÀÌ*¸í ¿Ï·á 2022-06-24 847
120148 homework ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-24 671
120147 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-06-24 2
120146 greeting ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-24 520
120145 What is the dirtiest job you could think of? Why? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-06-24 0
120144 Q È«*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-24 889
120143 Do you think it is better to have children when you are older or... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-24 991
120142 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-24 1
120141 political mamas ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-24 820
120140 what is the most difficult thing about learning English? ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-24 1066
120139 What is the most rewarding part of your job? ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-24 3
120138 IELTS part2 ÇÔ*¸® ¿Ï·á 2022-06-24 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04