¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework and advice

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2022-07-02 917

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Good morning, Donna~
I had a hard time yesterday, because Chief team leader in my clinic quit the job.
I think I'll go through a harder time about my work for a while so I am depressed.
However I'll get over this situation, and I really hope so.
Anyway this is my homework.
We can usually get tired of every trip, so we can easily sensitive.
Sometimes my wife and I argued about tiny things.
Actually it doesn't matter, but such situations can lead us wrong way.
And now I realized that our trip should be more comfortable, convenient and have more free time.
After changing my strategies of trip, we don't fight anymore.
From now on, I'll give you an advice.
You have coughed more than 2 weeks.
So I am worried about your health.
It's possible you got complications of COVID or other lung diseases.
Every diseases are not matters if they treated early.
I experienced many cases that late diagnosis causes bad results.
So, I strongly recommend you to go to the hospital.
Always be healthy~~

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening, Dr. Kim!

Apologies for being a little late in giving your homework feedback. This is the first time today that I can sit on my couch after a very long day of hustling and bustling. 

I am sorry to hear that your Chief Team Leader quit his post. Your clinic must have been surprised of his decision. Now, you have to make some adjustments to cope with this situation. Nonetheless, I know that you are capable of doing your best in these dire times. The former Chief must have a valid reason for leaving. 

Meanwhile, your realization about travel entails so much maturity and selflessness. In my country, it is advised for couples to travel together before marriage to know each other deeply and manage differences. In your case, your travel as a married couple taught you to let go of your ego to please your wife. That is sweet. Then for your next travel, I hope there will be no hassles. 

Finally, last Saturday, I went to see a doctor. She suspected that I might have gotten pneumonia that causes the recurring pain around my rib cage. She prescribed me medicines which I will tell you in class in the morning. I realized how stubborn I can be at times and I am grateful to your gentle reminder of how health must be our top priority. Thank you very much. ~

Your writing had very smooth transition. Your points were very clear. The details are on point. You are a great writer, carry on! 

Rest well and see you in a few.

-T. Donna ~

Good morning, Donna~
>> Correct!
Or: Good morning, Donna!

I had a hard time yesterday, because Chief team leader in my clinic quit the job.
>> I had a hard time yesterday because the Chief Team Leader in my clinic quit his job.

I think I'll go through a harder time about my work for a while so I am depressed.
>> Correct!

However I'll get over this situation, and I really hope so.
>> Correct!

Anyway this is my homework.
>> Correct!
Or: Anyway, this is my homework.

We can usually get tired of every trip, so we can easily sensitive.
>> We can usually get tired of every trip, so we can easily (get/ be) sensitive.

Sometimes my wife and I argued about tiny things.
>> Correct!

Actually it doesn't matter, but such situations can lead us wrong way.
>> Actually it doesn't matter, but such situations can lead us to the wrong way.

And now I realized that our trip should be more comfortable, convenient and have more free time.
>> And now I realize that our trip should be more comfortable, convenient, and have more free time.

After changing my strategies of trip, we don't fight anymore.
>> After changing my strategies of having a trip, we don't fight anymore.

From now on, I'll give you an advice.
>> Correct!

You have coughed more than 2 weeks.
>> Correct!

So I am worried about your health.
>> Correct!

It's possible you got complications of COVID or other lung diseases.
>> It's possible that you got complications of COVID or other lung diseases.

Every diseases are not matters if they treated early.
>> Every disease does not matters if they are treated early.

I experienced many cases that late diagnosis causes bad results.
>> Correct!
Or: I experienced many cases when late diagnosis caused bad results.

So, I strongly recommend you to go to the hospital.
>> Correct

Always be healthy~~
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120644 What illness are you afraid of the most and why? ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 749
120643 Do you think robots or AI will replace human teachers in the... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 787
120642 7/11 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 968
120641 Do you think the health care system in your country offers... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 990
120640 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 921
120639 How does one make good choices? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 4
120638 The appearance and character of the person I want to date. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 930
120637 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 912
120636 If you could choose another country to live in, where would it... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 1026
120635 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 598
120634 Which do you think is more important, physical health or mental... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 1
120633 Who do you admire? Do you try to be like this person (or people)? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 1
120632 What is your favorite foreign food? How is it different from... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 729
120631 What do you usually do after exercising? ÇÑ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 1
120630 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 1055
120629 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 2
120628 Homework for 08.07.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 2
120627 Of all the places you¡¯ve visited, whether it be in Korea or... ä*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 668
120626 What are the uses of your important gadget? ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 658
120625 What illness are you afraid of the most and why? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-11 903

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04