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영작교정 게시판

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자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

homework

작성자: 윤*원
2022-07-05 730

회원님의 영작문

Do you think there would be less illness in the future?
Yes. I think illness will be less in the future because nowadays the science is well developed and it continue to develop. So it will be less in the future.

Do you think health care should be free?
No. The health care shouldn't be free. There are many doctors who care the health of patient. So they have to get pay because they work for it.

What makes a good doctor?
Who is always be kind to patients, always be careful and always be honest is a good doctor.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용


Hi Se Won,
Thank you for making your essay..:) You can write your own basic, short sentences. You need to work on your writing structure. You should widen the vocabulary you use, as they tend to use the same words often. I recommend that you spend some time planning your writing before you begin. And you still use very simple sentences in English, I hope you can practice writing with more long and complex sentence structures. Keep practicing and improving your writing skills. ~ Teacher QUENNY 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Do you think there would be less illness in the future?
Yes. I think illness will be less in the future because nowadays the science is well developed and it continue to develop. So it will be less in the future.
>>Do you think there would be fewer illnesses in the future?
Yes. I think illness will be less in the future because artificially intelligent computer systems are used extensively in medical sciences nowadays and it's well developed as well will continue to evolve to treat and cure serious kinds of diseases like cancer and others. So there will be fewer illnesses in the future. 
Do you think health care should be free?
No. The health care shouldn't be free. There are many doctors who care the health of patient. So they have to get pay because they work for it.
>> Do you think health care should be free?
For me basic health care should be free to everyone because, it could save lives, in the long run, it's cost-effective, and providing free health care health people gain access to insurance. But it’s not possible for anyone to have free healthcare. Doctors need to be paid. Nurses need to be paid. Technicians and other medical staff need to be paid. Clinics, doctor’s offices, and hospitals need to be built run, and maintained. Equipment and supplies need to be purchased and maintained. There are many doctors who care about the health of patients. So they have to get paid because they work for it and it's not easy to become a doctor. 
What makes a good doctor?
Who is always be kind to patients, always be careful and always be honest is a good doctor.
>>What makes a good doctor?
A  good Doctor should be personable, a great listener, and empathetic to the concerns of their patients,” he elaborates. “They should not be condescending or arrogant. They should treat others as they want to be treated. And a Doctor must always be kind to patients, always careful, and always honest.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Do you think there would be less illness in the future?
Yes. I think illness will be less in the future because nowadays the science is well developed and it continue to develop. So it will be less in the future.

Do you think health care should be free?
No. The health care shouldn't be free. There are many doctors who care the health of patient. So they have to get pay because they work for it.

What makes a good doctor?
Who is always be kind to patients, always be careful and always be honest is a good doctor.
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