¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Hi Gemmar

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Áø
2022-07-08 847

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

ESSAY: Many claim that the fast food industry had a negative effect on the environment, eating habits, and families. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

I agree with that the fast food industry had negative effects.
but I will not calim for it, because I am sure that the fast food industry have also positive effects such like belows.
1. We don't have to spend our time to cook. specially in this hot summer.
2. There are many diverse food which we can choose.
3. Fast food is proper cost compare to having a meal at a restaurant.
4. Fast food is not concerned about TOP.

With my essay, I look like a fast food person.
But I am not. ^^

Have a wonderful weekend Gemma!

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Happy Friday Ms. Eunice! Friday is my most awaited day of the week! Hahaha! However, time flies so fast on weekends that before I knew it, it's already Monday. huhuhu Anyway, thank you for the helpful information and active discussion this week! Refresh and relax yourself on the weekend! I promise, I won't disturb you. hahaha See you Monday!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I agree with that the fast food industry had negative effects.
>> I agree with the claim that the fast food industry had negative effects.
but I will not calim for it, because I am sure that the fast food industry have also positive effects such like belows.
>>> But I will not claim it, because I am sure that the fast food industry also has positive effects such like as follows:
1. We don't have to spend our time to cook. specially in this hot summer.
>>> CORRECT
OR>>> 1. We don't have to spend our time to cook. specially in this hot summer season.
2. There are many diverse food which we can choose.
>>> There are diverse food which we can choose.
>>> There are many food which we can choose.
3. Fast food is proper cost compare to having a meal at a restaurant.
>>> 3. Fast food is more affordable compared to having a meal at a restaurant.
4. Fast food is not concerned about TOP.
>>> CORRECT
With my essay, I look like a fast food person.
>>> With my essay, I seem to be a person who's into fast food.
But I am not. ^^
>>> CORRECT

Have a wonderful weekend Gemma! ( YOU TOO) 


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120194 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 740
120193 Should your country accept refugees? Why or why not? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 0
120192 How do you manage sibling rivalry? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 1
120191 What do your family members do for work? ÇÑ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 14
120190 Homework For 06.24.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 3
120189 Do you think athletes earn enough money? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 714
120188 What do you think about extreme sports? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 859
120187 Have you ever helped someone who was feeling stressful? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 841
120186 How can stress be good, useful, or necessary? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 857
120185 6/26 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 673
120184 [Homework] Q. What Korean foods do you think are hard to cook?... ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 1
120183 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 610
120182 When talking to someone, what matters more to you, to hear how... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 852
120181 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 1084
120180 Identification ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 3
120179 Can you bear not having your cell phone for a week? À¯*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-25 719
120178 Thanks for your teaching. ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-06-25 685
120177 What is your favorite Korean dish and why? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-06-25 3
120176 My favorite Amusement park ride. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-06-25 374
120175 My favorite Amusement park ride. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-06-25 741

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04