¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you could choose another country to live in, where would it be and why? Answer in a few sentences

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*¿¬
2022-07-11 1319

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Living in Seoul is one of my dreams because I do cafe tour and shopping often, and there are plenty of trendy cafes and shops that attracts me in this city.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Judy!

It seems like there is no better country than yours because of Seoul City. Since you have been to other countries before, you can see how different South Korea is from them. Thus, enjoy your favorite places in Seoul, your enchanting city!

Thank you for this homework answer! I underlined the grammar suggestion I made. Moreover, I added 'too' at the second sentence suggestion. It's a long sentence with good construction and meaning. 

See you!

-T. Donna =)

Living in Seoul is one of my dreams because I do cafe tour and shopping often, and there are plenty of trendy cafes and shops that attracts me in this city.
>> Living in Seoul is one of my dreams because I do cafe tour and shopping often, and there are plenty of trendy cafes and shops that attract me in this city.
Or: Living in Seoul is one of my dreams because I do cafe tours and shopping often, and there are plenty of trendy cafes and shops that attract me in this city too.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118939 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-12 1
118938 Uniform ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-12 7
118937 What do you do when you plan to visit a place for the first time? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-12 1
118936 What gadget do you have that is not as useful as before? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-05-12 1
118935 If you can change something about the government of South Korea,... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-05-12 648
118934 Homework ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 0
118933 What kinds of friend qualities I like ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 626
118932 Bad manners what I hate. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 779
118931 Find a job À±*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 832
118930 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 866
118929 Homework and .. ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 675
118928 52/1212 H2O2M2E2W2O2R2K2 ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 687
118927 What\'s your favorite gadget? Please some details in the next... ¾ç*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 650
118926 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 1
118925 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 2
118924 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 1
118923 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 2
118922 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 0
118921 Does class size affect students¡¯ learning? ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 0
118920 What are the advantages and disadvantages of being bilingual? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-11 694

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04