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서비스 입니다.

SUMMER

작성자: 노*원
2022-07-12 1851

회원님의 영작문

We really need air conditioner to survive during the summer. Because It's not only hot also soggy in Korea. We can't survive to just get a fan. Usually, we think that it's better to turn on the AC strongly even though It's freezing than endure high temperature. Because, we just have to put on some outer. So, we almost have the AC and fan at every single home and company.
And, we go to Water park, Beach, or Vallry. I went to the cafe last weekend, and turned out It's near the valley. So, I could see around sightseeing and the people playing and swimming in the valley. Honestly, I just work and go back home and do same things everyday, so, I can't feel the summer vibe. But, I felt the summer vibe at this day. after that, I wanted to go out somewhere and I'm going to make a plan to summer holiday. I can't wait to enjoy my holiday!

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good evening Hui Won. Here's my correction to your essay. Thank you for your thoughts about the issue. ^_^
T. Irene
We really need air conditioner to survive during the summer. Because It's not only hot also soggy in Korea. 
>>> We really need air conditioners to survive the summer heat in Korea. It's also humid. 
We can't survive to just get a fan. 
>>> We can't survive by just using a fan. 
Usually, we think that it's better to turn on the AC strongly even though It's freezing than endure high temperature. Because, we just have to put on some outer. 
>>> Usually, we think that it's better to turn on the AC at a freezing temperature than endure a high temperature because we just have to put on warm clothes. 
So, we almost have the AC and fan at every single home and company.
>>> So, most homes and company buildings have both AC and fans. 
And, we go to Water park, Beach, or Vallry. 
>>> We also go to water parks, beaches and valleys. 
I went to the cafe last weekend, and turned out It's near the valley. 
>>> I went to a cafe last weekend and turned out to be near the valley. 
So, I could see around sightseeing and the people playing and swimming in the valley. 
>>> So I see people sigthseeing and swimming in the valley. 
Honestly, I just work and go back home and do same things everyday, so, I can't feel the summer vibe. 
>>> Honestly, I just work and go back home, doing the same things every day, so, I can't feel the summer vibe. 
But, I felt the summer vibe at this day. after that, I wanted to go out somewhere and I'm going to make a plan to summer holiday. 
>>> But, I felt the summer vibe today. I wanted to go out somewhere and I'm going to make a plan for the summer holiday. 
I can't wait to enjoy my holiday!
>>> Correct. 



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