¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Write a script answering the question: Where do you live?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*¾Æ
2022-07-27 1149

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I live in an apartment with my family in Hwaseong city.
There is a living room with a sofa
There are three bed room, two bed rooms are my children's room and the other is mine.
Also, the apartment faces the south so it is very bright and sunny during the day
and warm in the afternoon.
I spend most of my time in my computer room to study and relax.
It is very cozy and comfortable. so, I think my house is a good place to live.
In the past, I lived in a small apartment, but on the other hand, I live in a large apartment now.
Compared to my old house, my current house is brighter and more specious.
My old house had small three bedrooms with one bath room
but now, my current house with two bath rooms and big tree rooms.
Overall, my current house is better.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Julia!
Thank you for writing a script about your place. Please take note of the corrected sentences and practice them for our class on Friday.
Have a good afternoon!
Aki~
I live in an apartment with my family in Hwaseong city.
>>> CORRECT!
OR >>> I live with my family in an apartment in Hwaseong City.
There is a living room with a sofa.
>>> CORRECT!
There are three bed room, two bed rooms are my children's room and the other is mine.
>>> There are three bedrooms;  two bedrooms are for my children and the other is ours.
Also, the apartment faces the south so it is very bright and sunny during the day and warm in the afternoon.
>>> CORRECT!
I spend most of my time in my computer room to study and relax.
>>> I spend most of my time in my computer room studying and relaxing.
It is very cozy and comfortable. so, I think my house is a good place to live in.
>>> CORRECT!
In the past, I lived in a small apartment, but on the other hand, I live in a large apartment now.
>>> CORRECT!
OR>>> I used to live in a small apartment.
Compared to my old house, my current house is brighter and more spacious.
>>> CORRECT!
My old house had small three bedrooms with one bathroom.
>>> CORRECT!
but now, my current house with two bathrooms and big tree rooms.
>>> But now, my current house has two bathrooms and big three rooms.
Overall, my current house is better.
>>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122312 Please tell me about your first time talking with a foreigner. ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-14 2050
122311 09.13.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-14 3
122310 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-14 3037
122309 How My Parents Maintain a Good Health ±è*¿í ¿Ï·á 2022-09-14 1041
122308 Do you think it¡¯s necessary to preserve traditions? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-14 2255
122307 Some topics I avoid when I talk with someone for the first time ¾È*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-14 3427
122306 What was one idea you learned from the drama Narco Saints? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-09-14 2
122305 9/13 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-09-14 2155
122304 what do you think of a career in the army? ¹Ú*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-14 2051
122303 Book ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 1610
122302 9/13 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 2031
122301 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 2118
122300 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 1803
122299 What do you want to do next year? Why? ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 4
122298 What do you like most about celebrating Cheusok? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 2262
122297 What are the good and bad things about traveling? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 1992
122296 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 2
122295 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 1720
122294 How to stop fake news. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 2251
122293 What are you looking forward to most this coming holiday? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-13 2295

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04