¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What gadget is very destructive in your opinion? Share your answer in a few sentences.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*¿¬
2022-07-31 1106

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

A smartphone has a very destructive power to us.Thanks to a development of technology, we can handle many things with this small rectangular type of gadget. However, smartphones affect our health negatively through bad eye vision, back&neck pain, a lack of concentration and insomnia. Furthermore, as the number of phone users increases, cyber bullying is a significant problem in nowadays. Many stars have been troubled with online haters. For these reasons, I chose a smartphone as a destructive gadget.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Judy!

While it is true that Smartphones give us a lot of benefits, it is a double edged sword that cuts us when used wrongly. There is not much problem about this technology. It is the people who use it who we cannot control well.

Thus, congratulations on a job well done on this homework answer! Excellent job!

See you on the next class and homework.

-T. Donna~ 

A smartphone has a very destructive power to us.
>> Correct!

Thanks to a development of technology, we can handle many things with this small rectangular type of gadget. 
>> Thanks to the development of technology, we can handle many things with this small rectangular type of gadget. 

However, smartphones affect our health negatively through bad eye vision, back&neck pain, a lack of concentration and insomnia. 
>> Correct
Or: However, smartphones affect our health negatively through bad eye vision, back and neck pains, a lack of concentration, and insomnia. 

Furthermore, as the number of phone users increases, cyber bullying is a significant problem in nowadays. 
>> Furthermore, as the number of phone users increases, cyber bullying is a significant problem nowadays. 

Many stars have been troubled with online haters. 
>> Correct!

For these reasons, I chose a smartphone as a destructive gadget.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122535 Use the following words in creative sentences ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-09-22 2444
122534 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-09-22 0
122533 Should I go to university, or not? ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-09-22 2440
122532 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-22 3403
122531 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-22 1795
122530 Is it easy for you to forgive people who have hurt your feelings? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-22 3
122529 Give some examples of technology that have made the world worse. Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-22 2
122528 homework ÃÖ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-22 2730
122527 List two benefits (pros) and two drawbacks (cons) of learning... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-22 2605
122526 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-22 2484
122525 Who do you resemble most? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-09-22 3
122524 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-22 1
122523 Homework ±è*¿í ¿Ï·á 2022-09-22 2765
122522 Which is more important physical or mental health? ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-22 1
122521 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-22 0
122520 Do you think installing CCTV\'s can help reduce the incidence of... ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-22 1
122519 How would you maintain a good relationship with your family if... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-22 1885
122518 How do you clean your room? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-22 0
122517 Animal ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 2059
122516 How did you overcome your vices? ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-21 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04