¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What gadget is very destructive in your opinion? Share your answer in a few sentences.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*¿¬
2022-07-31 1056

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

A smartphone has a very destructive power to us.Thanks to a development of technology, we can handle many things with this small rectangular type of gadget. However, smartphones affect our health negatively through bad eye vision, back&neck pain, a lack of concentration and insomnia. Furthermore, as the number of phone users increases, cyber bullying is a significant problem in nowadays. Many stars have been troubled with online haters. For these reasons, I chose a smartphone as a destructive gadget.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Judy!

While it is true that Smartphones give us a lot of benefits, it is a double edged sword that cuts us when used wrongly. There is not much problem about this technology. It is the people who use it who we cannot control well.

Thus, congratulations on a job well done on this homework answer! Excellent job!

See you on the next class and homework.

-T. Donna~ 

A smartphone has a very destructive power to us.
>> Correct!

Thanks to a development of technology, we can handle many things with this small rectangular type of gadget. 
>> Thanks to the development of technology, we can handle many things with this small rectangular type of gadget. 

However, smartphones affect our health negatively through bad eye vision, back&neck pain, a lack of concentration and insomnia. 
>> Correct
Or: However, smartphones affect our health negatively through bad eye vision, back and neck pains, a lack of concentration, and insomnia. 

Furthermore, as the number of phone users increases, cyber bullying is a significant problem in nowadays. 
>> Furthermore, as the number of phone users increases, cyber bullying is a significant problem nowadays. 

Many stars have been troubled with online haters. 
>> Correct!

For these reasons, I chose a smartphone as a destructive gadget.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122013 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-08-30 2
122012 Are you happy with a two-day weekend or should it be three days?... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-30 2477
122011 Indra ±Ç*ÀÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-30 2
122010 What are the other ways that would help resolve inflation? ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-30 1
122009 Tell something about your \"dream lifestyle\". What type of life... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-08-30 1651
122008 What would you do if you found 100 euros or dollars in the... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-30 1848
122007 If you were the President of Korea, what would you do to improve... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-30 1892
122006 What would life be like without music? What does music mean to... ÃÖ*±³ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-30 2203
122005 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-30 1836
122004 What can the government do to increase the low birth rate in... ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-30 3117
122003 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-30 1
122002 superlative ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-30 1
122001 Skincare Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-30 2
122000 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-30 1
121999 What comes to your mind when you hear the expression \'Monday... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-30 2582
121998 Homework ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-30 1
121997 Homework ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-30 6
121996 Hi Jhozel ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-30 6
121995 Tell me about at least three particular places which are within... ¹Ú*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-30 1671
121994 What are the benefits of watching comedy movies? ³ë*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-30 1582

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04