¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

We are often told that \"you can¡¯t buy happiness\". If you were richer, do you think you would be ha

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*¿ø
2022-08-09 1060

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think money is needed for happiness.
If we don't have at least money to have meals and wear clothes, we can't think that we are happy now.
But if we have enough money to live daily life, our thought is more important to be happy than the money.
That's why every rich person isn't necessarily happy.
For example, one of the daughters of a previous Samsung owner committed suicide, even though she was the richest person in South Korea.
She broke up with her boyfriend because her parents didn't like him.
She felt frustrated because she realized she don't have freedom.
She got to think about her life negatively and even decided to commit suicide.
For this reason, money isn't a condition of happiness.
Thinking positively is a condition of happiness, and the proper freedom is needed to think positively.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Ji Won. It is always sad to hear about suicide stories. I agree with your opinion and being wealthy would still leave a person feeling empty. I am always looking forward to reading your thoughts on different subjects. Again, great job!^^ I hope you are having a good night. See you in our next class. ~Jane c", 


I think money is needed for happiness. 
>> CORRECT =)

If we don't have at least money to have meals and wear clothes, we can't think that we are happy now. 
>> CORRECT =) 

But if we have enough money to live daily life, our thought is more important to be happy than the money.
>> But if we have enough money to live our daily lives, we will think it is more important to be happy than have a lot of money.

That's why every rich person isn't necessarily happy. 
>> CORRECT =) 

For example, one of the daughters of a previous Samsung owner committed suicide, even though she was the richest person in South Korea.
>> CORRECT =) 

She broke up with her boyfriend because her parents didn't like him. 
>> CORRECT =) 

She felt frustrated because she realized she don't have freedom. 
>> She felt frustrated because she realized she doesn't have freedom. 

She got to think about her life negatively and even decided to commit suicide. 
>> CORRECT =) 

For this reason, money isn't a condition of happiness. 
>> CORRECT =) 

Thinking positively is a condition of happiness, and the proper freedom is needed to think positively. 
>> Thinking positively is a condition of happiness and the proper freedom is needed to think positively. 


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121472 Hi Gemmar ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 1146
121471 Aside from the USA, which country do you want to pursue your... ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 1
121470 homework À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 1032
121469 Post a picture of a famous landscape that you have been to or... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 1213
121468 Have to ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 2
121467 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 2
121466 Rain ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 1413
121465 What is the best assets? ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 1172
121464 homework ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 1306
121463 homework ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 4
121462 Describe a journey that didn\'t go as planned ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 2
121461 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 1171
121460 Child\'s aspirations Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 2
121459 Do you think English should become an official language in your... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 0
121458 Do you think bilingual or multilingual people can succeed more... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 0
121457 Make a sentence using the following words: 1. second 2. learn 3.... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-10 973
121456 8/9 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-09 922
121455 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-09 1306
121454 If you could change one thing in the world, what would it be? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-09 1587
121453 08.09 ¼÷Á¦ ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-09 8

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04