¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

If you could change one thing in the world, what would it be?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Çö
2022-08-10 1554

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I would like to make all of the harmful insects disappear. Mosquitoes, flies, cockroaches, etc are useless creatures in the world. It's not only worthless but also damaging the spirit of the people. Especially, it is often seen in everyday life in summer, and it is very annoying. Cockroaches are very dirty and mosquito sucks blood from people and make them itchy. It carries infectious diseases and flies which stuck-on food is disgusting. Recently I got a lot of stress about the flies existing everywhere, so I want to make the annoying creatures to die.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Olivia!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


I would like to make all of the harmful insects disappear. 

>> CORRECT!


Mosquitoes, flies, cockroaches, etc are useless creatures in the world. 

>> Mosquitoes, flies, cockroaches, etc. are useless creatures in the world. 

It's not only worthless but also damaging the spirit of the people. 

>> CORRECT!


Especially, it is often seen in everyday life in summer, and it is very annoying. 

>> Especially, it is often seen in everyday life during summer, and it is very annoying. 

Cockroaches are very dirty and mosquito sucks blood from people and make them itchy. 

>> Cockroaches are very dirty and mosquito sucks blood from people and make them feel itchy. 

It carries infectious diseases and flies which stuck-on food is disgusting. 

>> It carries infectious diseases and flies which stick on food are disgusting. 

Recently I got a lot of stress about the flies existing everywhere, so I want to make the annoying creatures to die.

>> Recently, I got a lot of stress with the flies existing everywhere, so I want to make the annoying creatures die.



-------------PLEASE LIMIT YOUR ANSWER TO 3-5 SENTENCES ONLY NEXT TIME, THANK YOU!--------------------

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118771 Money ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-05 2
118770 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-05 704
118769 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-05 643
118768 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-05-05 3
118767 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-05-05 1
118766 What are the things that usually annoy you? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-05-05 733
118765 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-05 1
118764 Iook at here Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2022-05-05 688
118763 What are the things that usually annoy you? ÀÌ* ¿Ï·á 2022-05-05 1
118762 Myhomework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2022-05-05 713
118761 If you can recommend a Korean dish to a foreigner, what would it... ÀÌ* ¿Ï·á 2022-05-05 570
118760 Which picture book is your favorite and why? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-05 699
118759 What was your dream job when you were young? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-05-05 3
118758 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-05 2
118757 Homework - 1. Self Introduction ÃÖ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 7
118756 5/4 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 673
118755 When are you most productive? ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 550
118754 Korea Children\'s Day ÀÌ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 603
118753 Which is a better way of studying English, online or face to... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 574
118752 Make sentence ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-05-04 627

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04