¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Which countries do you think have the harshest punishments? Do people need to be punished?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2022-08-12 1043

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

As I know, countries in the middle east have a strong purnishment in the world. They are known as conservative countries, especially they have a different standard for women. Although it is because of their religious belief, I can't understand why they are stricter to women than men. Especially, they sentence a death penalty to rape and sexcual harrassment. In contrast, Korea is one of the country which is lenient to criminals. Most people frequently complain about judgement from the court. We believe that final ruling depends on the public and economic status. Politicians must follow the national law and shoul be ethical because they are the representative of people in their country. Western countries's purnishment are much heavier than it in my country. I think we should introduce similar verdict system like advanced countries. The life sentence is contravertial but it sometimes need to protect general people and it can be the way to prevent from the potential crime.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

As I know, countries in the middle east have a strong purnishment in the world. 
>> CORRECT!
They are known as conservative countries, especially they have a different standard for women.
>> They are known as a conservative country, especially they have a different standard for women.
Although it is because of their religious belief, I can't understand why they are stricter to women than men. 
>> CORRECT!
Especially, they sentence a death penalty to rape and sexcual harrassment. 
>> Especially, they sentence a death penalty to people who commit rape and sexual harrassment. 
In contrast, Korea is one of the country which is lenient to criminals. 
>> In contrast, Korea is one of the countries which is lenient to criminals. 
Most people frequently complain about judgement from the court. 
>> CORRECT!
We believe that final ruling depends on the public and economic status. 
>> CORRECT!
Politicians must follow the national law and shoul be ethical because they are the representative of people in their country. 
>>  Politicians must follow the national law and should be ethical because they are the representatives of people in their country. 
Western countries's purnishment are much heavier than it in my country. 
>> Western countries' purnishment are much heavier than it is in my country. 
I think we should introduce similar verdict system like advanced countries. 
>> CORRECT!
The life sentence is contravertial but it sometimes need to protect general people and it can be the way to prevent from the potential crime.
>> The life sentence is controversial but it sometimes need to protect general people and it can be a way to prevent people from potential crimes.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121132 Should public transport be free? Why or why not? ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-28 1
121131 What is your dream car? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-07-28 4
121130 If you were invited to a fancy dinner with the president or a... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-07-28 841
121129 7/27 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 944
121128 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 991
121127 ? ±è*¿± ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1117
121126 Do you believe that a dog is a \"man\'s best friend\"? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 806
121125 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 822
121124 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 697
121123 What comes to mind when you hear the word ¡®earthquake¡¯? Why do... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 800
121122 How different would your life be if there were no Facebook,... ±Ç*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 782
121121 What was the last piece of good news you heard? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1071
121120 The life without books. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1043
121119 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1061
121118 Right? ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 2
121117 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 0
121116 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 2
121115 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1002
121114 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 964
121113 Which among your goals have you already achieved? ä*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 727

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04