¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What are the advantages and disadvantages of shopping at a mall?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°â
2022-08-24 934

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Mall has many interesting things. But shopping at a mall has advantage and also disadvantage. First the advantage of shopping at a mall is that we can see items directly and we can check the item's actuality by myself. And the disadvantage is that we should go to mall on foot inconveniently and it takes a lot of time. Anyway, I like shopping!

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Rana!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


Mall has many interesting things. But shopping at a mall has advantage and also disadvantage. 

>> The mall has many interesting things but shopping at a mall has an advantage and also disadvantage. 

First the advantage of shopping at a mall is that we can see items directly and we can check the item's actuality by myself.

>> The advantages of shopping at a mall is that we can see items directly and we can check the item's actuality by ourselves.

 And the disadvantage is that we should go to mall on foot inconveniently and it takes a lot of time. 

>> The disadvantage is that we should go to the mall on foot inconveniently and it takes a lot of time. 

Anyway, I like shopping!

>> CORRECT!


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
120204 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 1
120203 Do you worry about your health when you eat salty, sugary, and... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 1079
120202 The first case of monkeypox has been confirmed in Korea. What... ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 0
120201 Would you rather eat out or cook at home on special days? ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 1208
120200 greeting ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 1191
120199 homework À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 1005
120198 sad ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 972
120197 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 1
120196 Q È«*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 2
120195 In your opinion, what are the possible problems that your... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 992
120194 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 886
120193 Should your country accept refugees? Why or why not? ÁÖ*¼® ¿Ï·á 2022-06-27 0
120192 How do you manage sibling rivalry? ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 1
120191 What do your family members do for work? ÇÑ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 14
120190 Homework For 06.24.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 3
120189 Do you think athletes earn enough money? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 839
120188 What do you think about extreme sports? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 970
120187 Have you ever helped someone who was feeling stressful? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 962
120186 How can stress be good, useful, or necessary? ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 964
120185 6/26 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-06-26 777

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04