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Homework : Where I See Myself in 10 Years

작성자: 김*욱
2022-08-29 1507

회원님의 영작문

Homework:

Title: Where I See Myself in 10 Years

Where do you see yourself in 10 years? What are your long-term plans? What do you plan to do in a span of 10 years? Tell something about it using 3 to 4 short paragraphs.



After 10 years from now, I must be an Canadian citizen and I will do my occupation that related to my major I'll study after going to Canadian College.
And I'll study French in a span of 10 years, because French sounds very attractive, and Canada's official language is English and French. so studying it is worth.
And I'll practice piano until I can play Chopin's compositions. I have played piano since I was in elementary school, but I don't have much time to practice. I have to study hard when I was in high school, And after finishing my duty of defence, I have been pressed for time because I already spent almost 2 years in Korean Army. I want to accomplish a skill that can play La campanella of Chopin that I didn't complete.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Thank you for taking the time to do your homework today, Jason. You did well with your sentence construction. There are a couple of corrections here which I have provided, so please take the time to review them. Again, thank you. Keep doing your best! I'm very proud of you! :)


After 10 years from now, I must be an Canadian citizen and I will do my occupation that related to my major
>> Ten years from now, I must be a Canadian citizen already doing an occupation related to my major.
I'll study after going to Canadian College.
>> I'll study again after going to a Canadian College.
And I'll study French in a span of 10 years, because French sounds very attractive, and Canada's official language is English and French. so studying it is worth.
>> I'll also study French in a span of 10 years, because I think that French is a very attractive language also, Canada's official languages are English and French so studying it is worth it.
And I'll practice piano until I can play Chopin's compositions.
>> Correct.
I have played piano since I was in elementary school, but I don't have much time to practice. I have to study hard when I was in high school, 
>> I have played the piano since I was in elementary, but now, I don't have much time to practice because I has to study hard when I was in high school.
And after finishing my duty of defence, I have been pressed for time because I already spent almost 2 years in Korean Army.
>> After finishing my duty of defense, I have been deprived of the luxury of time because I spent almost 2 years in the Korean Army.
I want to accomplish a skill that can play La campanella of Chopin that I didn't complete.
>> I want to continue practicing so that I can play Chopin's La Campanella which I haven't completed yet.

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