¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Use the following words in simple sentences

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½Å*¼·
2022-09-15 2380

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

When I got a sadness, I could treat my mood to listen to music like pop, lock and rap songs. Also, I have an aggressive thing to make me calm, if I have trouble things. Thanks for your teaching always kindly.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there, Elic! You're welcome, it's my pleasure to teach you every day. You are such an amazing student and it shows by how well you perform in class. Your progress motivates me to keep teaching and helping a lot of students. :) Please continue what you are doing, never give up on your dreams. Here are some of my corrections, please review them well. Have a nice day! :)


hen I got a sadness, I could treat my mood to listen to music like pop, lock and rap songs.
>> When I feel sadness, I treat myself by listening to pop & lock and rap music.
Also, I have an aggressive thing to make me calm, if I have trouble things.
>> Also, I can be aggressive sometimes when I get into trouble, I try my best to keep calm.
Thanks for your teaching always kindly.
>> Thanks for always teaching me kindly.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121134 07.27.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-28 1
121133 Describe a time in your life when you felt sad ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-28 0
121132 Should public transport be free? Why or why not? ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-28 1
121131 What is your dream car? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-07-28 4
121130 If you were invited to a fancy dinner with the president or a... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-07-28 932
121129 7/27 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1025
121128 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1042
121127 ? ±è*¿± ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1158
121126 Do you believe that a dog is a \"man\'s best friend\"? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 981
121125 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 971
121124 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 833
121123 What comes to mind when you hear the word ¡®earthquake¡¯? Why do... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 986
121122 How different would your life be if there were no Facebook,... ±Ç*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 961
121121 What was the last piece of good news you heard? ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1249
121120 The life without books. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1104
121119 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1146
121118 Right? ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 2
121117 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 0
121116 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 2
121115 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-07-27 1133

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04