¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What does it mean when you say, \"We are the architects of our own lives\"?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*Èñ
2022-10-04 2659

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

That means you can do everything, once you put your mind to it.
You can challenge what you want regardless of your age, race and nation.
Before challenge, you need to plan our life closely like an architect.
A careful plan make our life more lovely and perfect like a beautifully worked architecture.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Erin!^^ Good afternoon!

Thank you so much for this composition. I have read it well.

The future is something that we will design. While our parents, professors, and mentors can point out the right path for us to follow and offer guidance, only we have the power to choose our own success.

I will talk to you later in class. Have a good day!

__T. Mayleen :)


That means you can do everything, once you put your mind to it.
>>> That means you can do anything once you put your mind to it.
>>> OR: That implies that anything is possible if you set your mind to it.

You can challenge what you want regardless of your age, race and nation.
>>> You can achieve what you want regardless of your age, race, and nation.
>>> OR: Regardless of your age, ethnicity, or country, you can accomplish whatever you set your mind to.

Before challenge, you need to plan our life closely like an architect.
>>> Before a challenge, you need to plan your life closely like an architect.

A careful plan make our life more lovely and perfect like a beautifully worked architecture.
>>> A careful plan, like a beautifully crafted architecture, makes our lives more lovely and perfect. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121550 Are there any rules in your country about eating in public? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-08-12 1341
121549 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-12 1103
121548 Is reading fairy tales better than watching television? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-12 1607
121547 homework À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 2295
121546 What are the possible benefits of working on weekends? / What... ¹Ú*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1101
121545 8/11 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1403
121544 Ocean ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1059
121543 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1302
121542 What are the ways to prevent health problems? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1437
121541 What do you love doing with your relatives? ±è*°â ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1586
121540 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1103
121539 If you could be another man or woman for a day, who would you... ±è*°â ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1055
121538 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 2
121537 What if you could spend your life never sleeping? What would you... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1231
121536 Dairy Áö*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1056
121535 Is change always good? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1351
121534 check please ÇÏ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 4
121533 What is your opinion about your country¡¯s disaster... ÀÌ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 4
121532 Which is better, shopping in shops or shopping online? ¼­*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1329
121531 Use at least 2 to 3 short paragraphs to describe your best and... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-08-11 1420

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04