¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think bullying should be made a crime or is it part of growing up?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2022-10-11 2455

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Children must have a lot of experiences before they become an adult because people usually have matured after hard time. However, school bullying is not right thing whcih students must experience. Many students have complained of mental problem and physical pain too. It sometimes leads to teenager's suicide. Bullying exists various forms - mental, physical and cyber bullying. I don't think that punishment with the law is the right solution because we have already studied it in our life. The crime rate has not been decreasing, although there are many method to punish criminals. Students, teachers and parents have to aware how they feel. Most students who have experienced bullying feel anxiety every time. Adults might not understand their psychological status because they consider it as a light problem. It is not easy to solve this issue but if all people try to solve the problem, we can solve the problem.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

Children must have a lot of experiences before they become an adult because people usually have matured after hard time. 
>> CORRECT! 
However, school bullying is not right thing whcih students must experience. 
>> However, school bullying is not a right thing which students must experience. 
Many students have complained of mental problem and physical pain too. 
>> CORRECT! 
It sometimes leads to teenager's suicide. 
>> CORRECT! 
Bullying exists various forms - mental, physical and cyber bullying. 
>> Bullying exists in various forms - mental, physical and cyber bullying. 
I don't think that punishment with the law is the right solution because we have already studied it in our life. 
>> CORRECT! 
The crime rate has not been decreasing, although there are many method to punish criminals.
>> The crime rate has not been decreasing, although there are many methods to punish criminals.
Students, teachers and parents have to aware how they feel. 
>> Students, teachers, and parents have to be aware of how they feel. 
Most students who have experienced bullying feel anxiety every time. 
>> Most students who have experienced bullying feel anxious every time. 
Adults might not understand their psychological status because they consider it as a light problem.
>> CORRECT! 
 It is not easy to solve this issue but if all people try to solve the problem, we can solve the problem.
>> CORRECT! 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123960 Apology and homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-03 2052
123959 Research about what \'lactose intolerant\' is ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-12-03 1213
123958 Complete the following sentences ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-12-03 1836
123957 Homework (12/2) ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-03 4
123956 What offers or requests shouldn¡¯t you refuse? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-12-03 1895
123955 In your opinion, what habits should you have to have a... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-02 1826
123954 Watching movies in English is heplful for learning English. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-12-02 1733
123953 Are online dating sites just a scam? Why or why not? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-02 1701
123952 Why do you think it\'s difficult for people to talk about... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-02 1903
123951 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-02 1772
123950 HOMEWORK: Make a sentence for each of the indefinite pronouns:... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2022-12-02 2
123949 Do you think your neighborhood is safe? ±è*½Ä ¿Ï·á 2022-12-02 0
123948 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-02 1503
123947 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-02 1376
123946 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-12-02 2
123945 What\'s more important to you when you travel - comfort and... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-02 1451
123944 ¿µÀÛ Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-02 1684
123943 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-02 0
123942 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-12-02 0
123941 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-02 1703

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04