¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think bullying should be made a crime or is it part of growing up?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Ȳ*ÇÏ
2022-10-11 2367

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Children must have a lot of experiences before they become an adult because people usually have matured after hard time. However, school bullying is not right thing whcih students must experience. Many students have complained of mental problem and physical pain too. It sometimes leads to teenager's suicide. Bullying exists various forms - mental, physical and cyber bullying. I don't think that punishment with the law is the right solution because we have already studied it in our life. The crime rate has not been decreasing, although there are many method to punish criminals. Students, teachers and parents have to aware how they feel. Most students who have experienced bullying feel anxiety every time. Adults might not understand their psychological status because they consider it as a light problem. It is not easy to solve this issue but if all people try to solve the problem, we can solve the problem.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

Children must have a lot of experiences before they become an adult because people usually have matured after hard time. 
>> CORRECT! 
However, school bullying is not right thing whcih students must experience. 
>> However, school bullying is not a right thing which students must experience. 
Many students have complained of mental problem and physical pain too. 
>> CORRECT! 
It sometimes leads to teenager's suicide. 
>> CORRECT! 
Bullying exists various forms - mental, physical and cyber bullying. 
>> Bullying exists in various forms - mental, physical and cyber bullying. 
I don't think that punishment with the law is the right solution because we have already studied it in our life. 
>> CORRECT! 
The crime rate has not been decreasing, although there are many method to punish criminals.
>> The crime rate has not been decreasing, although there are many methods to punish criminals.
Students, teachers and parents have to aware how they feel. 
>> Students, teachers, and parents have to be aware of how they feel. 
Most students who have experienced bullying feel anxiety every time. 
>> Most students who have experienced bullying feel anxious every time. 
Adults might not understand their psychological status because they consider it as a light problem.
>> CORRECT! 
 It is not easy to solve this issue but if all people try to solve the problem, we can solve the problem.
>> CORRECT! 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122682 media ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-29 3049
122681 Myhomework Àü*¼± ¿Ï·á 2022-09-29 1993
122680 How do you stay cool in the summer? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-29 1
122679 9/28 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-09-29 1737
122678 Food ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 1813
122677 09.28.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 2
122676 Home ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 1723
122675 9/28 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 2070
122674 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 2472
122673 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 0
122672 If you could draw an image to describe your personality, what... ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 3
122671 homework ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 0
122670 Does sadness play an important role in people¡¯s lives? ÀÌ*Å ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 1947
122669 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 1819
122668 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 2
122667 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 1592
122666 Who\'s the most adventurous person in your family? And why? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 1794
122665 What makes you want to travel? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 2129
122664 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 2569
122663 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-28 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04