¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

10/17 homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çö
2022-10-17 2954

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

People who meet me for the first used to say that I look kind and nice.
In fact, when I was in the elementary school, classmates said that at first it was difficult to talk to me because I was with a blank face.
So, people often misunderstood my charecteristics for the first impression, and after they got along with me, they changed their minds.
I had a chance to practice smiling.
Someone advised me that It would be great to smile showing teeth because my teeth was straight and I had a beautiful smile.
Since that time I practiced smile in front of mirror and try to smile before other people.
I think my effort works and now I could give people a good impression.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there, Dr. Stella!

Sometimes a sweet, sincere, and a warm smile is all we need to creat the best first timpression. This is true in your case. Well, the people who have been with us for a very long time know who we truly are and those we just met, we continuously try our best to win their hearts.

Anyway, there are some grammar patterns and suggestions to a few of your sentences below. Your writing contains very clear images due to the way the sentences were made. Keep up the strong sense of correctness in your composition.

See you then!

-T. Donna~

People who meet me for the first used to say that I look kind and nice.
>> People who meet me for the first time used to say that I look kind and nice.

In fact, when I was in the elementary school, classmates said that at first it was difficult to talk to me because I was with a blank face.
>> Correct!
Or: In fact, when I was in the elementary school, my classmates said that at first,  it was difficult to talk to me because I was with a blank face.

So, people often misunderstood my charecteristics for the first impression, and after they got along with me, they changed their minds.
>> Correct!

I had a chance to practice smiling.
>> Correct!

Someone advised me that It would be great to smile showing teeth because my teeth was straight and I had a beautiful smile.
>> Someone advised me that it would be great to smile showing teeth because my teeth are straight and I have a beautiful smile.

Since that time I practiced smile in front of mirror and try to smile before other people.
>>Since that time,  I practiced smiling in front of the mirror and tried to smile before other people.

I think my effort works and now I could give people a good impression.
>> Correct!
Or: I think my efforts work and now, I could give people a good impression.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121872 Have you ever been the victim of a crime? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 4
121871 Caleb\'s homework for 23 Aug 2022 ±Ç*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 2449
121870 homework ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 1
121869 Which smartphone app is your favorite? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 1
121868 08.23.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 1
121867 Is getting angry an effective way of dealing with problems? ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 1060
121866 Can you talk about a person who has influenced your life? ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 2007
121865 What are the ways to prevent health problems? ÀÌ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 2386
121864 Why the goals are important. ±è*¼º ¿Ï·á 2022-08-25 1219
121863 8/24 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-24 2039
121862 How important do you think it is to use public transport? ¹Ú*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-24 1762
121861 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-24 1748
121860 8/24 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-24 1250
121859 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-24 2084
121858 Homwork ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-24 1578
121857 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-24 823
121856 Can you talk about a person who has influenced your life? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-24 1244
121855 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-24 1529
121854 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-08-24 4
121853 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-24 2376

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04