¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is the worst disaster in your opinion? Share your answer in a few sentences.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*¿¬
2022-10-18 3035

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I realized the worst disaster to human being is the war when I heard what was happened in Ukraine. It left many casualties and collapsed buildings. Men were forced to enlist in the army, and women were raped by the enemy. It shows how creulty looks like and must not be begun.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening, Judy!

You are right about this man-made disaster. Raging war kills so many people from both parties. Surely, there is no winner in this case. Due to the leader's desire of stronger power, s/he places countries in peril. This is unimaginable during the 21st Century. Nevertheless, we hope that the war will end soonest.

Below are my grammar suggestions. Read each sentence carefully and spot the difference.

See you in class tomorrow!

-T. Donna~

I realized the worst disaster to human being is the war when I heard what was happened in Ukraine. 
>> I realized that the worst disaster to human beings is war when I heard what was happening in Ukraine. 

It left many casualties and collapsed buildings. 
>> Correct!

Men were forced to enlist in the army, and women were raped by the enemy. 
>> Correct!

It shows how creulty looks like and must not be begun.
>> it shows how cruelty looks like and must not continue.


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123936 Which of your actions / habits could possibly annoy others? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-12-02 1667
123935 What do you think about marijuana as a legal drug? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-12-02 2
123934 12/1 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-12-02 1878
123933 What do you think about celebrities getting involved in bad... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 1933
123932 What is your opinion about the executive order released against... ±è*¹® ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 2285
123931 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 1625
123930 If you were a clothing item, what would you be and why? Please... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 2
123929 Homework (12/01) ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 5
123928 Are you generally a positive person or a negative person? How? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 1857
123927 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 2
123926 30.Nov.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 2
123925 What kind of diet or meal plan do you have? Do you plan the food... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 1399
123924 homework ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 1709
123923 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 0
123922 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 1671
123921 An office policy ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 2
123920 ¼÷Á¦ Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 2210
123919 I prayed in the name of Jesus, entrusting the beginning and end... ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 1643
123918 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 1
123917 What\'s the best way to get to the library? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-01 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04