¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you think most companies look after their staff? Why or why not?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Àü*ä
2022-10-27 3015

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

It depend on the company, but most companies care their staff to a certain extend.
It is similar about welfare.
As far as I know every companies have to provide a comprehensive medical testing for staff.
And major company also provide every meals and even dormitory.
After work, even they provide leisure system like gym, ground, shopping point..
Company almost responsible about staff's life.
Like this if company provide these welfare it must be helpful their staff. Company can control staff's stress and it will make people improve efficiency.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Eun Chae!
You are right in your point of view.  Check the corrections suggested in your writing and memorize the correct patterns and spellings of words.  Try to use these sentences in class too. ^^



~T. Maine


It depend on the company, but most companies care their staff to a certain extend.
>>It depends on the company, but most companies care about their staff to a certain extent. 
It is similar about welfare.
>> It is similar to their welfare. 
As far as I know every companies have to provide a comprehensive medical testing for staff.
>> As far as I know, every company has to provide comprehensive medical testing for the staff. 
And major company also provide every meals and even dormitory.
>> And major companies also provide meals and dormitories. 
After work, even they provide leisure system like gym, ground, shopping point..
>> After work, they even provide a leisure system like the gym, play ground, and shopping areas. 
Company almost responsible about staff's life.
>> Companies are responsible for their staff's life. 
Like this if company provide these welfare it must be helpful their staff. 
>> Like this, if the company provides these things, they might be helpful to their staff's development. 
Company can control staff's stress and it will make people improve efficiency.
>> Companies can control staff's stress and it will make them work efficiently. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
128168 Writing task ¾È*Çü ¿Ï·á 2023-05-12 2505
128167 What kind of business would you like to put up and why? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-05-12 1
128166 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-05-11 2
128165 homework 05.11 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-05-11 1518
128164 Homework ±è*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-11 1
128163 What was the best gift that you received on your birthday? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-05-11 2347
128162 The most enviable thing about rich people is they can make a lot... ÀÌ*¿õ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-11 2
128161 When was the last time you had difficulty beating your deadline?... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-11 1
128160 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-11 1615
128159 An animal that I want to be ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-05-11 2570
128158 If you could change any one of your physical characteristics,... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-05-11 2362
128157 Having a good university degree guarantees people a good job? Do... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-05-11 2209
128156 ¡°accidentally on purpose¡± ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-05-11 1908
128155 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-11 1
128154 Do you want to help poor children? How? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-05-11 1
128153 Homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-05-11 0
128152 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-11 1
128151 Write down answer about \\\\The first impression\\\\ ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-05-11 6
128150 What places in your country would you recommend for foreign... ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-05-11 2219
128149 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-11 1519

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04