¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

10/24 homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çö
2022-10-30 3538

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I often hope to be at a spa or get some massage for relaxing whole body when I feel tired and stressed.
I have been in the mood for a relaxing treat this week because of my work.
I had an important presentation for a conference last thursday.
I felt burdonsome and stressful preparing this presentation for recent few weeks.
Even the day before the presentaion, I couldn't sleep well because I was so nervous.
Luckily, I finished my presentation well.
After I ended my presentation, I felt comfort and tired.
So, I spent time supplementing my sleep and shopping.
As though I recieved a relaxing treat, I was refreshed and relaxed without worry.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Dr. Stella!

It is wonderful to know that if you are in a mood for some treat for yourself, you go for it. I think that is very brave and well deserved. When you are tired and feel to simply relax, soothe yourself.

Below, there are some spelling and grammar suggestions. Moreover, word forms vary when used in different positions in sentences. Hence, kindly go over the sentences carefully and make sure to note down the correct word forms. 

Excellent exposition! See you again soon!

-T. Donna~

I often hope to be at a spa or get some massage for relaxing whole body when I feel tired and stressed.
>>  I often hope to be at a spa or get some massage for relaxing the whole body when I feel tired and stressed.

I have been in the mood for a relaxing treat this week because of my work.
>> Correct! Very good sentence!

I had an important presentation for a conference last thursday.
>> Correct!
Or: Thursday

I felt burdonsome and stressful preparing this presentation for recent few weeks.
>>  I felt burdensome and stressed preparing for this presentation for the recent few weeks.

Even the day before the presentaion, I couldn't sleep well because I was so nervous.
>> Correct!
Or: presentation

Luckily, I finished my presentation well.
>> Correct!

After I ended my presentation, I felt comfort and tired.
>> Correct!

So, I spent time supplementing my sleep and shopping.
>> Correct!

As though I recieved a relaxing treat, I was refreshed and relaxed without worry.
>> As I have received a relaxing treat, I was refreshed and relaxed without worries.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123013 Describe your own room in your house. How does it look like?... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-15 2
123012 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-15 2655
123011 Use these words in sentences ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-10-15 2080
123010 Weaknesses ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-15 0
123009 How do you usually feel on your first first day of class? ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-10-15 2912
123008 10/14 HOMEWORK ヾ(≧¡ä≦*)o ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-14 2711
123007 10/14 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-14 2465
123006 spontaneous ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-14 2131
123005 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-10-14 2
123004 What does¡°life is what happens to you while you are busy making... ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-10-14 2480
123003 What are some traits of teachers? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-14 2350
123002 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-14 2050
123001 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-14 2869
123000 What are you planning on doing this weekend? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-14 2498
122999 The award that I got from my school, and academy ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-14 0
122998 Use these words in sentences ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-10-14 2374
122997 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-14 2423
122996 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-14 2629
122995 Vacation should be about a week. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-10-14 3271
122994 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-10-14 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04