¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How do you feel when you take food supplements? Share your answer in a few sentences.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*¿¬
2022-11-01 1766

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I believed taking collagen will be helpful to cure stretchmarks because i gained weight over the years. So, i tried a low molecular fish collagen which is a powder type, but i felt nothing. There¡¯s no effect on my skin, and i realized it¡¯s difficult to remove it once it appears.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Judy!

Congratulations to your perfect grammar here on your homework answer! Unfortunately, you do not feel any good effect from collagen. Hence, there is no better substiture to eating less and also moving more.

Your composition had a very good introduction, a detailed body, and a complete conclusion. Great job!

See you later in class!

-T. Donna~

I believed taking collagen will be helpful to cure stretchmarks because i gained weight over the years. 
>> Correct!
Or: I believed taking collagen will be helpful to cure stretchmarks because I gained weight over the years. 

So, i tried a low molecular fish collagen which is a powder type, but i felt nothing. 
>> Correct!
Or: So, I tried a low molecular fish collagen which is a powder type, but I felt nothing. 

There¡¯s no effect on my skin, and i realized it¡¯s difficult to remove it once it appears.
>> Correct!
Or: There¡¯s no effect on my skin, and I realized that it¡¯s difficult to remove it once it appears.ambiance 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
125047 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-24 1287
125046 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-24 2
125045 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-24 2
125044 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-24 1302
125043 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-23 3
125042 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-23 0
125041 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-23 3018
125040 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-23 991
125039 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-23 1080
125038 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-23 971
125037 Who is your favorite past government official? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-22 0
125036 Why do you think it¡¯s important to vote? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-22 0
125035 How do you think other people see you when you make a mistake? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-22 0
125034 How important is it to smile when you meet someone for the first... Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-22 0
125033 Did you like the experience of speaking with your Indian... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-01-21 1
125032 What makes you happy? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-01-21 977
125031 If someone talk about me. ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-01-21 1072
125030 I think people who collect insects or have them as pets are¡¦ ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-01-21 990
125029 mt favorite genre ¹Ú*º° ¿Ï·á 2023-01-21 1025
125028 homework ½Å*ÈÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-21 907

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04