¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Was there a greater \"sense of community\" between neighbors in the past? If so, what has changed?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2022-11-11 2337

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If my memory serves me right about my childhood, neighbors in the apartment where I lived got along with each other. In the past, we knew neighbors and tried to care for each other. At least, we had a sense of community. However, I don¡¯t know when it started to reduce our interest in each other, we seem to make excuses for neglecting our neighbors by saying that we are too busy to take care of each other. In terms of business, we are not as busy as we used to be in my childhood. Probably, the phenomenon of indifference can be brought about by education which has urged students to get ahead and survive the competition. In such an extreme competition, there can¡¯t be any coworkers or friends, but competitors. Students have lost a good opportunity to learn how to collaborate, and live together even at school, they just learned to how to survive others. Before it¡¯s too late, Korean education should be improved so that students can learn how to cooperate with others in a competitive world.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Steve! ^^
Thank you for the composition.
See you in our next class! :)

~ Teacher Tricia


If my memory serves me right about my childhood, neighbors in the apartment where I lived got along with each other. 
>>> CORRECT!

In the past, we knew neighbors and tried to care for each other. At least, we had a sense of community. 
>>> CORRECT!

However, I don¡¯t know when it started to reduce our interest in each other, we seem to make excuses for neglecting our neighbors by saying that we are too busy to take care of each other. 
>>> CORRECT!

In terms of business, we are not as busy as we used to be in my childhood. 
>>> CORRECT!

Probably, the phenomenon of indifference can be brought about by education which has urged students to get ahead and survive the competition. 
>>> CORRECT!

In such an extreme competition, there can¡¯t be any coworkers or friends, but competitors. 
>>> CORRECT!

Students have lost a good opportunity to learn how to collaborate, and live together even at school, they just learned to how to survive others. 
>>> Students have lost a good opportunity to learn how to collaborate, and live together even at school, they just learned how to survive others. 

Before it¡¯s too late, Korean education should be improved so that students can learn how to cooperate with others in a competitive world.
>>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
125365 It\'s positive development. ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-06 1222
125364 What is you phobia and why? Á¤*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-06 1424
125363 What make you happy and why? Á¤*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-06 1451
125362 Do you like vegetables? What\'s your favorite one? ¹è*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-06 2102
125361 homework Æí*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-06 1
125360 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-06 2
125359 2/6 Homework ÃÖ*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-06 1139
125358 Do you agree that Samsung should file a complaint against 17... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-06 1484
125357 Homework ¼Û*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-02-06 2
125356 What is the most effective way to keep in touch with your loved... ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-02-06 1572
125355 When can stress be healthy? Àå*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-02-06 1325
125354 2/6 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-02-06 5
125353 What is your favorite animal? Why do you like it? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-06 1
125352 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-02-05 1615
125351 What do you miss most when you are traveling? ¾ç*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-02-05 1224
125350 Why do some people collect things? ¼Û*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2023-02-05 2
125349 The helping ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-05 1
125348 Bullying ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-05 0
125347 The Risk of dangerous. ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-02-05 1334
125346 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-02-05 1426

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04