¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Was there a greater \"sense of community\" between neighbors in the past? If so, what has changed?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2022-11-11 2197

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

If my memory serves me right about my childhood, neighbors in the apartment where I lived got along with each other. In the past, we knew neighbors and tried to care for each other. At least, we had a sense of community. However, I don¡¯t know when it started to reduce our interest in each other, we seem to make excuses for neglecting our neighbors by saying that we are too busy to take care of each other. In terms of business, we are not as busy as we used to be in my childhood. Probably, the phenomenon of indifference can be brought about by education which has urged students to get ahead and survive the competition. In such an extreme competition, there can¡¯t be any coworkers or friends, but competitors. Students have lost a good opportunity to learn how to collaborate, and live together even at school, they just learned to how to survive others. Before it¡¯s too late, Korean education should be improved so that students can learn how to cooperate with others in a competitive world.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Steve! ^^
Thank you for the composition.
See you in our next class! :)

~ Teacher Tricia


If my memory serves me right about my childhood, neighbors in the apartment where I lived got along with each other. 
>>> CORRECT!

In the past, we knew neighbors and tried to care for each other. At least, we had a sense of community. 
>>> CORRECT!

However, I don¡¯t know when it started to reduce our interest in each other, we seem to make excuses for neglecting our neighbors by saying that we are too busy to take care of each other. 
>>> CORRECT!

In terms of business, we are not as busy as we used to be in my childhood. 
>>> CORRECT!

Probably, the phenomenon of indifference can be brought about by education which has urged students to get ahead and survive the competition. 
>>> CORRECT!

In such an extreme competition, there can¡¯t be any coworkers or friends, but competitors. 
>>> CORRECT!

Students have lost a good opportunity to learn how to collaborate, and live together even at school, they just learned to how to survive others. 
>>> Students have lost a good opportunity to learn how to collaborate, and live together even at school, they just learned how to survive others. 

Before it¡¯s too late, Korean education should be improved so that students can learn how to cooperate with others in a competitive world.
>>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
124448 What comics have you read in English? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-28 1
124447 Homesickness ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-12-28 1212
124446 Do you think public transportation is better than driving your... Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-12-27 1440
124445 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-27 1627
124444 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-12-27 2
124443 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-12-27 1
124442 How would you feel if there weren¡¯t any holidays? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-27 1310
124441 Christmas movies! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-12-27 1395
124440 \"Happiness is not in the mere possession of money; it lies in... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-12-27 1359
124439 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-12-27 0
124438 Tuesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-27 1471
124437 Is Christmas too commercial nowadays? How should a very... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-27 1645
124436 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-27 1568
124435 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-27 1
124434 What can we do to avoid eating junk food? ¹Ú*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-27 1
124433 How to make feel happy for visitors. ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-12-27 1092
124432 Romio and Juliet + Greek story ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-12-27 1423
124431 Do you like reading comic strips? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-27 0
124430 Influence of policians and scientists ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-12-27 1393
124429 Do you prefer to message or talk on the phone? Why? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-12-27 1488

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04