¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Why is doing volunteer work important?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±¸*¿ì
2022-11-13 3219

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

It's because volunteering helps poverty family or people, and it is good to our emotion like happy or great. And maybe I will respect about how the poverty people survived this extreme environment and facility or we can empathize their feeling at that time.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Daisy. :)
Thank you for writing this essay. 
Volunteering is good because it opens our eyes to the dire situation of other people which in turn helps us empathize and extend a helping hand. 
I hope this day is going great for you. ^^
See you again later. ^^
~Teacher Charry

It's because volunteering helps poverty family or people, and it is good to our emotion like happy or great. 
>> It's because volunteering helps poor families or people, and it is good for our emotions because helping others can make us feel happy or great. 
And maybe I will respect about how the poverty people survived this extreme environment and facility or we can empathize their feeling at that time.
>> In addition, maybe it helps us learn how to respect poor people and realize how they are able to survive an extreme environment or situation. Volunteering helps us empathize with how they feel at that time. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
124934 Homework ¼Û*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-17 2
124933 Exercise is important! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-01-17 1105
124932 What are the good and bad things about dating? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-01-17 1034
124931 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-01-17 0
124930 homework ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-17 1312
124929 ¿µÀÛ ¼÷Á¦ ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-17 0
124928 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-17 2
124927 I think ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-17 1350
124926 If there will be NO weekend, what do you think will happen? Àå*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-01-17 1411
124925 seem ¹Ú*±¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-17 2
124924 16.Jan.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-17 2
124923 Which is the best supermarket to shop at in your country? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-17 0
124922 Should l need to say ¡°sorry¡±? ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 1308
124921 mountain or sea ¹Ú*º° ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 1005
124920 1/16 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 1824
124919 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 1
124918 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 1313
124917 What can always put you in a better mood after a bad day? ¼Û*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 2
124916 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 1514
124915 What is your dream home? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-16 1646

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04