¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you agree that the police should be held accountable for what happened in Itaewon? Why or why not

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼±*
2022-11-16 2287

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I agree that the not only police but also government should also be held accountable for what happened that day. That's because the police are not at the level to make decisions in the bureaucracy, which means following the orders from the top. The police couldn't command orders without the top dogs' permission.
In addition, that day they had special order from the ministers for checking drug users, so they focused on the mission. One policeman working in that district recognized the heavy crowd and asked to send more policemen there, but his requisitions were neglected. he must have been there and known the seriousness of the situation. However, nobody tried to listen to him, and the tragedy and crowd crush happened at the speed of blinking eyes.
In conclusion, the government must say sorry to the victims and they blame themselves for their negligence, laziness, and ignorance.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Miss Sun!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

I agree that the not only police but also government should also be held accountable for what happened that day. 
>> CORRECT! 
That's because the police are not at the level to make decisions in the bureaucracy, which means following the orders from the top. 
>> CORRECT! 
The police couldn't command orders without the top dogs' permission.
>> CORRECT! 
In addition, that day they had special order from the ministers for checking drug users, so they focused on the mission. 
>> CORRECT! 
One policeman working in that district recognized the heavy crowd and asked to send more policemen there, but his requisitions were neglected. 
>> CORRECT! 
he must have been there and known the seriousness of the situation. 
>> CORRECT! 
However, nobody tried to listen to him, and the tragedy and crowd crush happened at the speed of blinking eyes.
>> CORRECT! 
In conclusion, the government must say sorry to the victims and they blame themselves for their negligence, laziness, and ignorance.
>> CORRECT! 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
122454 Which part of your appearance are you most proud of? I\'m told... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 1
122453 ask age Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-20 1
122452 9/19 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 2576
122451 movie ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 2686
122450 What do you think of cosmetic surgery? Àü*ä ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 3322
122449 9/19 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 2818
122448 09.19.2022 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 2
122447 My favorite teacher (*^_^*) ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 2373
122446 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 1716
122445 What makes you different from everyone else? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 2874
122444 Homework ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 1928
122443 Oh no .. I knew this was today\'s hw page.. (Sep 19) ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 6
122442 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 0
122441 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 2
122440 What is the best way to make new friends? Do you like making new... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 2361
122439 How do you feel after a long vacation. ¹é*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 2439
122438 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 1793
122437 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 0
122436 When you travel, would you rather go to a place where there are... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 2007
122435 Monday Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-09-19 1743

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04