¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

In some countries, most people prefer to rent their homes rather than buying them. Which one do you

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±¸*¿ì
2022-11-25 1883

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think it is better to buy my home. Because if we rent their homes, we can have some fight with house's host or the other people live in there. And having my own house is very happy to me and we can live any other interference. I think we can have more cost than rent house but we can live there happily, it is very good to us.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening Daisy! ^_^
Thank you for diligently answering this essay question. You truly are hard-working. 
I agree that owning your own home is better than renting one. I think this is one of the best investments you could ever have in your entire life. 
I hope you're doing great right now. 
See you again on Monday and have a happy weekend. :)
~Teacher Charry

I think it is better to buy my home. 
>> I think it is better to buy my own home. 
Because if we rent their homes, we can have some fight with house's host or the other people live in there. 
>> It's because if we rent other people's homes or apartments, we can get into fights with the home owners or other renters. 
And having my own house is very happy to me and we can live any other interference. 
>> In addition, having my own house makes me feel very happy and I can live without any interference. 
I think we can have more cost than rent house but we can live there happily, it is very good to us.
>> I think we would have to spend more in buying our own house rather than renting one but we can live in our own house happily. It is very good for us.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
123164 What are the advantages and disadvantages of attending concerts? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-23 2
123163 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-23 2421
123162 Is there a food that you will never eat? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-22 2
123161 Do you want to live in a posh area? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-10-22 0
123160 Hotel ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-22 1
123159 Why are gifts important in our life? ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-10-22 3375
123158 Do you prefer to go to festivals alone or with others? ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-10-22 2431
123157 Weekend ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-21 1831
123156 About the development of social networking sites. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-10-21 2794
123155 Do you want to be a Queen? Why or why not? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-21 3010
123154 What are the best memories you have spent with your grandparents? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-21 2092
123153 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-21 2798
123152 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-21 2200
123151 My Homework °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-10-21 2384
123150 Homework ¼Û*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-10-21 3003
123149 Homework ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-21 3141
123148 some | any | a little | a few | much | many (There are sometimes... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-21 1880
123147 What will you do this weekend to relax? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-21 3578
123146 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-10-21 2
123145 Homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-10-21 2322

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04