¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

eating only between 1pm and 8pm, and then not eating for the rest of the day and night. What could b

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2022-12-16 998

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I heard intermittent eating is one of the most effective diets from those around me. There are some people practicing intermittent eating for losing weight. However, if you succeeded to lose weight as much as you want, I don't think you need to maintain intermittent eating because eating three times a day is one of the happiness God gave to people in their dull lives. Anyway, intermittent eating will help you get in shape, and give you back a healthy body. If you have failed to go on a diet before, give it a try. It doesn't hurt to try it.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Steve! ^^
Thank you for the composition.
See you in our next class! :)

~ Teacher Tricia


I heard intermittent eating is one of the most effective diets from those around me. 
>>> CORRECT!

There are some people practicing intermittent eating for losing weight. 
>>> CORRECT!

However, if you succeeded to lose weight as much as you want, I don't think you need to maintain intermittent eating because eating three times a day is one of the happiness God gave to people in their dull lives. 
>>> CORRECT!

Anyway, intermittent eating will help you get in shape, and give you back a healthy body. 
>>> CORRECT!

If you have failed to go on a diet before, give it a try. It doesn't hurt to try it.
>>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
124490 I cook sometimes. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-12-29 911
124489 12/29 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-12-29 830
124488 Use the following words in sentences ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-12-29 969
124487 What are the benefits of graduating from college? Does it also... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-12-29 965
124486 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-12-29 1
124485 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-29 1002
124484 (Homework)ESSAY: What are the negative impacts of playing... ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-29 2
124483 The traveling ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-29 1
124482 If you could run a company or a business, what kind of business... ±è*¹® ¿Ï·á 2022-12-29 1048
124481 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-29 1133
124480 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-29 0
124479 three tings i am grateful for. ¹Ú*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-12-29 1027
124478 My opinion of making a friend ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-12-29 1232
124477 Finally trying Korean food ±è*À² ¿Ï·á 2022-12-29 735
124476 12/29 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-12-29 6
124475 What¡¯s the headline today? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-29 2
124474 Homework ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-12-29 4
124473 12/28 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-12-29 813
124472 I need your explanation ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-28 1257
124471 What are the negative impacts of playing computer games? What... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-28 1780

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04