¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Do you like meeting new people?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2022-12-20 1996

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I don't usually like meeting new people because I know nothing about them. I don't know about their personality or what they like. Also, they are strangers to me and I can't talk to them as I do to my friends. In addition, talking to strangers like new people is pretty hard for me because I'm shy.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Chloe!

Thanks for sending your composition. I appreciate it.  Please check the corrections and alternative sentences. 
See you tomorrow!

Cheers,
Jean~~


I don't usually like meeting new people because I know nothing about them. 
>> OR: Getting to know new people is something I don't normally do. 

I don't know about their personality or what they like.
>> OR: They're literally strangers to me. 

Also, they are strangers to me and I can't talk to them as I do to my friends. 
>> OR: On top of that, we practically know nothing about each other so we've got nothing to talk about. 

In addition, talking to strangers like new people is pretty hard for me because I'm shy.
>> OR: Moreover, my shy personality makes it even harder for me to relax and socialize with people I don't know. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
125189 2023-1/30 HOMEWORK ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-30 994
125188 1/30 Homework ÃÖ*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-30 2094
125187 Homework ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-01-30 1
125186 What is the pros and cons of having a few close friends and... ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-30 984
125185 What\'s your thought on school teachers accepting presents or... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-30 2
125184 Let\'s think about reason ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-30 0
125183 Tech ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-30 1104
125182 homework1 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-01-30 3
125181 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-01-30 1034
125180 Homework ¹æ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-01-30 3
125179 Please try to find top three things that can overcome your stage... ·ù*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-01-30 1162
125178 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-30 1178
125177 homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-01-30 2
125176 homework ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-30 1127
125175 homework ä*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-30 1088
125174 What is your opinion about a four-day week? ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-01-30 2491
125173 IELTS book1 45p - Question5 ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-30 2
125172 Organization ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-30 0
125171 Answer : What do you think will the future look like 10 years... Á¤*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-01-30 1260
125170 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-01-30 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04