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서비스 입니다.

Are you capable of relieving your stress or do you need help?

작성자: 황*하
2022-12-21 1597

회원님의 영작문

I thought I am optimistic and easily relieve my stress but I get easily angly and upset, especially, if I thought that somebody ignore me although, they don't. In regard to relationship with my wife, I tend to be upset, if my wife give advices while I am driving. This is common behavior of men because they thought women are inferior than men about driving. However, I don't get frequently angly on the other situation. I guess that I am quite good at keeping mental health. So, I don't need help from professionals. If I am stressful, I do a lot of things to relieve it. First of all, somking is the most effective way and it doen't need much time to do it. Secondly, I go out for exercising or drinking alchool. Lastly, it is also good to have time with close friends and tell something in my mind. To live in modern society, it is challenging to cope with new environment, so people have to read books and study how to manage their mental health.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Good day, Sir Hwang!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


I thought I am optimistic and easily relieve my stress but I get easily angly and upset, especially, if I thought that somebody ignore me although, they don't. 
>> I thought I am optimistic and easily relieve my stress but I get easily angry and upset, especially, if I thought that somebody ignores me although, they don't. 
In regard to relationship with my wife, I tend to be upset, if my wife give advices while I am driving. 
>> In regard to relationship with my wife, I tend to be upset, if my wife gives me pieces of advice while I am driving. 
This is common behavior of men because they thought women are inferior than men about driving.
>> This is a common behavior among men because they think women are inferior than men about driving.
However, I don't get frequently angly on the other situation. 
>> However, I don't get frequently angry on other situations. 
I guess that I am quite good at keeping mental health. 
>> CORRECT! 
So, I don't need help from professionals. 
>> CORRECT! 
If I am stressful, I do a lot of things to relieve it. 
>> If I am stressed, I do a lot of things to relieve it. 
OR >> If I feel stressed, I do a lot of things to relieve it. 
First of all, somking is the most effective way and it doen't need much time to do it. 
>> First of all, smoking is the most effective way and it doesn't need much time to do it. 
Secondly, I go out for exercising or drinking alchool. 
>> Secondly, I go out for an exercise or for a drink.
Lastly, it is also good to have time with close friends and tell something in my mind. 
>> CORRECT! 
To live in modern society, it is challenging to cope with new environment, so people have to read books and study how to manage their mental health.
>> CORRECT! 

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